Love, Work and Health: Today, I realized that my work life is far less stressful than... - FML

By Cop-er-Pot - 16/10/2017 16:00

Today, I realized that my work life is far less stressful than my home life. I'm a cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 607

You deserved it 309

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Same thing different taste

By SebastianMiko - 09/11/2012 07:18 - Canada - Calgary

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 106

You deserved it 2 323

No one is safe

By chili - 24/07/2021 04:01

Today, I got mugged at work. The sad thing is I'm a cop and was trying to catch the people who mugged me previously while off duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 859

You deserved it 333

By Anonymous - 04/04/2017 09:07

Today, coming home after a hard day's work was so relaxing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 777

You deserved it 487

Wise words

By Anonymous - 05/01/2022 05:01

Today, I realised that I live to work. I’m not even good at my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 937

You deserved it 195

They'll hear you coming

By Anonymous - 30/09/2019 06:00

Today, I was diagnosed with exercise-induced asthma. I wanted to be a cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 743

You deserved it 177

Stress factor 11

By Jonoq - 04/10/2019 16:00 - Canada

Today, in a 2-hour period at work, I had to talk to the cops, clean up shit and clean up vomit, yet none of these events were related. The worst part is, I work as a lifeguard and none of this is in the job description. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 484

You deserved it 126

Nice neighborhood

By dinkley7 - 25/04/2021 02:00

Today, the cops showed up at my work because people were fighting in the parking lot. This is a nightly occurrence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 785

You deserved it 99

By Ava_Darkflame - 01/01/2017 15:54 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I had to call the police to get my crazy stalker of a neighbor out of my house. When the police arrived, I found out that she was friends with the officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 515

You deserved it 168

Lifegoals

By Anonymous - 29/05/2023 18:00 - Germany - Buchholz in der Nordheide

Today, I’m unemployed with no children and hardly any social life, so you’d think my life was a constant, boring holiday, when in fact I'm so busy every day that I think I might have to designate myself a “day off” just to recover from the stress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 499

You deserved it 352

By Anonymous - 16/09/2009 02:27 - United States

Today, I realized my job is so boring that I spend most of my time trying to take a dump than actually working. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 623

You deserved it 6 750

Next

Top comments

exileonmainst 16

Monday 16 October 2017 17:14

Bad family, bad family. What'cha gonna do? What'cha gonna do when they come for you?

pjsr 32

Monday 16 October 2017 19:53

Like the soldier who answered his nagging wife's letters, "Its the 1st time I've been in a big war, and I want to enjoy it in peace for as long as I can"

Comments

exileonmainst 16

Monday 16 October 2017 17:14

Bad family, bad family. What'cha gonna do? What'cha gonna do when they come for you?

wanted_2_want 40

Monday 16 October 2017 17:23

Yep. Sometimes one is prisoner of our own problems. You need to bail out.

RichardPencil 30

Monday 16 October 2017 17:30

I’d imagine that at your house “**** the Police” would be foreplay!

pjsr 32

Monday 16 October 2017 19:53

Like the soldier who answered his nagging wife's letters, "Its the 1st time I've been in a big war, and I want to enjoy it in peace for as long as I can"

Lobby_Bee 17

Monday 16 October 2017 22:01

It's hard, you can't exactly shoot your family and sprinkle some crack on them. So yes, home can be more stressful.

Onionfairy99 4

Thursday 19 October 2017 22:36

Someone seems a little bitter

davecross 11

Tuesday 17 October 2017 4:45

You need some therapy. Or maybe a divorce!

kousagiii 4

Tuesday 17 October 2017 5:24

I found that for me, that I was a happier person at work than I was at home. Home life has gotten a bit better but, not by much.

darnellq 13

Tuesday 17 October 2017 13:56

I feel ya. I’m in the exact same boat.

TeachAllTheMath 19

Saturday 4 November 2017 10:49

Any way out? Any escape possible? Life is too short to be miserable in your own home

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Love Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 784

You deserved it 22 715

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 318

You deserved it 9 464

The Top

Today, I took a dump without checking for toilet paper. I then called my step dad, who said "use the stuff in the garbage." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 505

You deserved it 5 644

Today, and forever, I've never had a woman try to hit on me, so when my barista asked if I’d like to come to her place after her shift, I didn’t immediately realise she meant sex, so I actually stupidly said, “What for?” She got embarrassed and people glared at me like I was scum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 240

You deserved it 531

Today, I was diagnosed with a tumor and had to cancel on the holidays with my crush of 4 years. He is taking another girl with him instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 498

You deserved it 205

Today, I pretended to be asleep when my mom and her best friend came home because I was tired as hell and I didn't want to be around them. I was then treated to a loud conversation about my mom's first time with a woman through our paper-thin walls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 313

You deserved it 725

Today, my state decriminalized small amounts of every hard drug you can name. Heroin, LSD, cocaine, you name it. I'm a recovering addict. I moved to Oregon to get away from the big city and drugs and take in nature. No I didn't. I knew this would happen. I'm screwed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 911

You deserved it 1 160

Today, my blind mother kept covering her ears any time I spoke to her and kept counting down every 20 minutes to the upcoming NFL game, which came on at 4pm. Finally dejected, my husband and I left after kickoff. She made my father call to guilt trip us about how she wanted us to stay for the game for Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 506

You deserved it 99