Intimacy: Today, I realised my girlfriend only has sex with me to make...

By mattttbob - 04/02/2012 10:16 - Australia

Today, I realised my girlfriend only has sex with me to make me exercise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 513

You deserved it 36 009

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By fatnick - 07/10/2009 17:06 - United States

Today, my wife told me that the only reason she gets it on with me is for the extra calorie burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 073

You deserved it 3 308

By Anonymous - 06/10/2012 23:04 - United States

Today, my girlfriend texted one of her male friends, saying she's turned off by the thought of sex with me. She suggested a bit of "exercise sex" with him. I'm sure he would have eagerly agreed, if he'd been the one receiving the texts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 030

You deserved it 2 833

By rawdoglyfe69 - 17/04/2013 06:14 - United States - Helena

Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 477

You deserved it 6 074

Get on with it!

By QuickieGirl - 16/09/2011 11:28 - United States

Today, I realized my girlfriend thinks that the goal of sex is to get it over with as quickly as possible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 381

You deserved it 6 117

By beaverless - 02/05/2011 20:26 - United States

Today, my girlfriend kindly broke the news to me that she doesn't want to take part in any sexual activity anymore because it's getting too boring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 526

You deserved it 17 576

Effective

By zstarr - 14/07/2012 11:15 - United States - Rome

Today, I realized my boyfriend uses sex as a way to get me to stop talking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 618

You deserved it 32 410

By anonymous - 24/06/2010 05:09 - United States

Today, I went running. My girlfriend was so surprised at the fact that I'm exercising that she accused me of making it up so I could cheat on her. I'm just trying to get in shape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 691

You deserved it 5 218

Bored

By Anonymous - 23/06/2022 18:00

Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 200

You deserved it 380

Health kick

By Anonymous - 05/02/2022 00:01

Today, after my wife set a new rule to improve my health, one sex session for every three visits to the gym, which has greatly improved our sex life for two months, and I've never been fitter, but now she complains I'm not keeping her company on the couch anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 723

You deserved it 183

By evecamp - 10/02/2010 05:09 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 11 months told me that she's been faking her orgasms the whole time. Just to make me "proud" of myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 093

You deserved it 5 946

beddington 7

Saturday 4 February 2012 16:05

Doesn't matter had sex.

MasterE56 4

Saturday 4 February 2012 16:01

Nothing wrong with that!

Comments

jcingram 2

Saturday 4 February 2012 22:22

Ydi....everyone does

neonberries 15

Saturday 4 February 2012 22:46

You're seriously going to complain about having sex!? And you call yourself a man!!!!

causticgirl 6

Saturday 4 February 2012 23:09

Mmmm. It's excellent cardio when done well.

momo1972 3

Saturday 4 February 2012 23:10

Can I join that gym?

mama2b3 20

Sunday 5 February 2012 0:39

Sounds like a win-win to me...

aron666 25

Sunday 5 February 2012 0:44

Only matters that she loves you, and you had sex

Shutter_Shades12 4

Sunday 5 February 2012 0:57

I love this!

droln4maltesers 8

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:23

And the problem here is...?!!!

dbnumberiv 2

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:48

Man card revoked

EduJav321 24

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:49

Think about it: Not fit = sex Toned = no sex ... i think you're good

Keywords

Health Relatable Public freakouts Music Scams Geek Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Bikes Transportation Cops Fight Family Kids Mother in law Miscellaneous AITA Relationship advice Social Media Love Art Work Students Noise Animals Birds Sleep Mental health Medication

The Top

Today, I asked out a girl I’ve been hanging out with for a few months. She said, “That’s kind of gross.” When I asked her about, it she said, “My friends will think you’re creepy” followed by, “You’re not actually a creep, they say you look like one.” I groom myself every day like a normal person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 445

You deserved it 101

Today, my dad uttered the dreaded words, “Now don’t worry boy, I knows exactly what I is doing.” A few short minutes later he has a destroyed impact drill, my ladder is snapped, my kitchen window is broken, my wife is in hospital for stitches, and we can’t find the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 504

You deserved it 66

The Top

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and said I was not 'Christian enough' for her. Later I found out she had been cheating on me with my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 617

You deserved it 2 543

Today, my roommate placed something on a shelf I put up, and the whole thing came crashing down. It's been fine for 2 years and now the shelf decides to break? Yeah right, dude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 99

Today, I dyed my hair. It was all going well, until I forgot I had a head full of product and scratched an itch. I didn't realise my mistake until later, and now have to replace my six-month old sofa because it has a huge stain that alternates from purple to bleach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 357

You deserved it 3 085

Today, my baby-crazy mother expressed her concerns that I haven't conceived after a whole two months of marriage. Her advice amounted to "get divorced while you're still hot, sleep around until you get pregnant, then marry the winner." When I complained to my father, he supported her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 370

You deserved it 3 172

Today I got fired from a very promising new job where I made three times my previous salary from my previous job. Why? Because of a personal belonging, my bumper sticker that says, "How’s my driving? Call 1-800-EAT-SHIT." FML

I agree, your life sucks 443

You deserved it 2 353

Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 748

You deserved it 6 011