Today, I noticed that my new shampoo had an unfamiliar pink color to it. After some investigation, I found a dead mouse that had apparently cut itself on the bottle pump. I've been washing my hair with mouse blood. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I found out that the horrific smell coming from somewhere in my kitchen was a rotting dead mouse that somehow got stuck in my dishwasher. I have been eating off plates washed in dead mouse water for the past week. FML
Today, I noticed my shower drain wasn't draining well. I cleaned it out, thinking it was just a rat's nest of hair. Wrong. It was an actual dead rat. FML
Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML
Today, I discovered that the rancid stench in my bathroom was a decaying carcass of a mouse in my toilet tank. FML
Today, I found out the crappy shampoo I've been borrowing from my girlfriend is actually "feminine wash." FML
Today, I decided to change my hair color. After waiting in anticipation, I took a shower to rinse out the dye and reveal my new, blue hair. Rinsing revealed not only blue hair, but blue skin caused by the watered dye running over my body. I now look like a smurf, and it's not coming out. FML
Today, my water wouldn't go down my shower drain. Confused, I stuck a metal stick expecting hair, but instead stabbed and pulled up a rat that was dead in my drain. FML
Today, I found out that the mysterious smell from under my bed was my cats collection of dead mice. FML
Today, someone, and I still can't figure out who, switched my shampoo with mayonnaise. FML
Today, after emptying the dishwasher, I noticed something in the back by the drain. It looked like a turkey bone. Upon closer inspection, it was a mouse carcass. I have no idea how many loads of dishes have gone through with it in there. FML
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Top comments
SwaggCapone 11
That's nasty! *Cleveland voice*
engineerosaurus 26
Extra protein?
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Comments (163)
Zebediabolical 45
Did it work?
supernaturalcat 12
That was one determined mouse
Obey_StudBoii 23
Nothing like extra protein lol.
evan_7899 28
How did the mouse cut itself on the pump, are you sharpening it to make a plot to mildly cut your husband
justindrew14 29
ewww u need to fix that
FrostyKittens 24
So metal
TheJordanBryant 11
Wow.
BMTHsuperfan 18
who needs keratin treatments when you've got fresh mouse blood?
cottoncandymango 17
I'd be scarred for life. Get your house inspected for rodents and such.
yourmurderscenex 13
No need to get inspected. its already obvious that there are indeed rodents.
aron666 25
According to ancient belief, blood has some special healing power.
47twixbars 13
Tell that to the poor mouse.
worldclassrager 41
Now my stomach is churning...why did I finish reading this? Well you have the smell of the hunt...until it runs out...and I advise some mousetraps..,