Today, I'm getting kicked out of my flat because my drunk friends stole a pony and left it tied outside. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, while celebrating at my friend's birthday party, I fell down a flight of stairs, got into a fight with my flatmate, and ruined my friend's outfit after drinking too much. I'm expecting I'll need to find a new place to live tomorrow. FML
Today, I was woken up and kicked out of my friend's party at 3:00 in the morning. This wouldn't have been so bad if someone hadn't stolen my shoes. I had to walk for an hour in the rain, in my socks. FML
Today, not only did someone steal my bike, they also managed to get wasted and drunkenly ride my stolen bike through my new screened-in front porch, destroying it and the bike. FML
Today, I got kicked out of my favorite pub. I yelled at the group behind me for being annoying. They were extremely irritating, singing songs and cheering, but the manager decided to kick me out instead. FML
Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML
Today, I was over at a friend's place until very late. He had stolen my keys as a joke at some point, but by the time I noticed, he was too drunk to remember where he'd hidden them. FML
Today, I woke up to find out my house was robbed. He didn't steal anything of value, but he stole my beer, dog, and cat. FML
Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find that while I was passed out someone stole my prosthetic leg. FML
Today, after a night of heavy drinking, I woke up handcuffed to my bed. My friends who are responsible for this think it's hilarious and claimed not to remember where they put the keys. They took pictures, then left. FML
Today, my mom got drunk and told me to leave the house because "I've been mooching off her for too long". I'm 14 and now am sleeping at my friends house. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
oklahomaguy 0
Your landlord is probably mad because he's not hung like that pony.
Matias_Says_FML 4
Yay for the pony!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (157)
hannahmorgan06 7
hey, they must have mad skills to go steal a pony.
loah 0
The traveling caravan oh Gypsy's?
Brooding99 15
You have some seriously awesome friends! They brought you a pony the day before you got kicked out to cheer you up! You should totally thanks them :)
auddylynne 0
Bahaha! That's awesome! Was the night worth it? Guess one of them owes u a new flat?? Haha
KaelaKhaotic 5
Why are YOU getting kicked out for something your friends did?
Turbolence 1
Your friends are now 20% less cooler.
CiaranPM 0
I'm surprised that more of those "brony" morons haven't commented.
Mysanitywins 10
Rofl. Morons? Thanks asshole.
atroxletum 6
Moron? You're making it really difficult to love and tolerate you, but I think I'll manage.
duckman9 55
Mormons? Who said anything about mormons? I sure didnt. And the horse has nothing to do with the pile of magnets lying in front of my door.
jlstewart 3
You deserve it for telling your 4 year old daughter to clean her room. She's 4, let her be a kid.
blackprince2012 9
Sounds lik somethin out of tge hangover..
colezone21_fml 0
You spelled frat wrong :(
pink_raindrops 26
"Flat" means apartment....