Today, I'm getting kicked out of my flat because my drunk friends stole a pony and left it tied outside. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, while celebrating at my friend's birthday party, I fell down a flight of stairs, got into a fight with my flatmate, and ruined my friend's outfit after drinking too much. I'm expecting I'll need to find a new place to live tomorrow. FML
Today, I was woken up and kicked out of my friend's party at 3:00 in the morning. This wouldn't have been so bad if someone hadn't stolen my shoes. I had to walk for an hour in the rain, in my socks. FML
Today, not only did someone steal my bike, they also managed to get wasted and drunkenly ride my stolen bike through my new screened-in front porch, destroying it and the bike. FML
Today, I got kicked out of my favorite pub. I yelled at the group behind me for being annoying. They were extremely irritating, singing songs and cheering, but the manager decided to kick me out instead. FML
Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML
Today, I was over at a friend's place until very late. He had stolen my keys as a joke at some point, but by the time I noticed, he was too drunk to remember where he'd hidden them. FML
Today, I woke up to find out my house was robbed. He didn't steal anything of value, but he stole my beer, dog, and cat. FML
Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find that while I was passed out someone stole my prosthetic leg. FML
Today, after a night of heavy drinking, I woke up handcuffed to my bed. My friends who are responsible for this think it's hilarious and claimed not to remember where they put the keys. They took pictures, then left. FML
Today, my mom got drunk and told me to leave the house because "I've been mooching off her for too long". I'm 14 and now am sleeping at my friends house. FML
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Top comments
oklahomaguy 0
Your landlord is probably mad because he's not hung like that pony.
Matias_Says_FML 4
Yay for the pony!
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Comments (157)
alex6946 10
I like ponies(:
HomeAl0ne 20
How did the landlord connect it with you?
lilody_fml 0
Llllllllllllllllllll O Lll O L Ol ? L L L L Lol K Lllllllll?llllllol OO L Ll Ll L Ol Ol O Ll Lll L L L Ll Ol Ol Ll O O Llooo Ollooo Oooll OloollooooloolololloolllolL Lo
pugsley208 0
That... Is... Epic
T552 12
Easily one of the best FML's I've ever read
CupcakeFanaTIC 2
A pony of all things...
FRUKUS 5
Aww, a pony :3
CatPerson123 0
Ohhhh I just learned what a flat-mate is!!
punkin_26 16
I agree. One of the best!
attaboy368 20
Sorry you got kicked out but dude seriously that is kinda funny tooo'