Today, I learned the hard way that taking a 20 mile bike ride with my boyfriend's family the day after losing my virginity is the worst decision ever. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
Today, I gave my virginity to my boyfriend. All I got in return was rug burn and an infection. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML
Today, I lost my virginity. He then told me, in tears, how bad he felt about leaving his dog alone for the night. FML
Today, I lost my virginity. In the middle of it, he just gave up and said he wasn't in the mood anymore. Then I had to listen about his past failed relationships for over an hour. FML
Today, I lost my virginity. Afterwards, he told me that he was only doing this because he wanted to know if he still truly loves his girlfriend. FML
Today, I was unaware that me losing my virginity was also breakup sex. FML
Today, I realized that I get more turned on by my exercise bike than my boyfriend of 4 years. FML
Today, I decided it was time to lose my virginity to my boyfriend. After about ten minutes he started going faster and his stomach was slapping against mine. It was making a weird sound so I started laughing. Apparently that wasn't sexy and he went soft. My first time and we didn't even finish. FML
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Top comments
geekpowerwtf 0
When is taking a 20 miles bike ride not a bad decision?
ollie179 21
"somebody likes it rough"
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Comments (108)
perdix 31
Etiquette tip: In that situation, an appropriate thing to say is, "Thank you, Mr & Mrs _____, but I won't be joining you on the bike ride because your son deflowered me with extreme prejudice."
IndigoAcrylic 9
Sweej 1
Lololololol
Sweej 1
Lololololol
Sweej 1
Lololololol
Sweej 1
Lololololol
angelemi1419 4
hahahaha depends on how old OP is.
ninjaCarebear 17
I live in Iowa too :D
jimmy1997 0
reveled hott
jessie96xoxo 0
Ouch..
mcerin 10
Maakes for an amazing story to share , a ways down the road ahah . After my first time, I had to do the splits and cartwheels & shit In gym class ):
sassmachine 0
gym class? you were probably way too young.
iMagzzzy 0
Good luck ever walking again ;)
IAintYourDaddy 0
Before you went on the ride you should have bought, vaginal padded compression shorts, a seat pad, and ride a really smooth bike. Just Sayin
tcurry_fml 0
Should have packed an ice pack :P
applesdontpee 3
lol that totally reminded me of that scene from Dodgeball where he got hit in the balls and had to sit on that cooler full of ice
JiggyBoo123 11
So? Who cares? You lost your virginity, big whoop. It's not like you got straight out of bed onto a bike. What, was your crotch so small before you had sex that he had to RIP IT ALL OPEN or something?
dragonforerunner 2
Haha I did something similar to one of my exs. She had biked to my place, I pounded her, then sent her back home across town. Lol
eviegirl247 0
Bitch...
bawlerr75 9
Ouch :/ that musta hurt...