Inspired comment. You, sir, have a way with words.

Really wanted to be first, eh?

I have been inspired by this beautiful, genius comment to write a 30 chapter novel. I shall dedicate it to you, my good man.

The redundancy is almost... poetic. Well done, 1.

Haha, lol stfu

I read 11's comment in class and laughed out loud and got stared at for a couple of mins.. Just letting you know 11. It made people think i'm weirder than i actually am :x haha

#9 FOOL! Who said they were words?

I love the response's that I got from my completely pointless and redundant comment. I just really wanted to see how people would make fun of me.

i completely agree. it was rather redundent wasnt it?

I'm sure he didn't like being under water or man handled.

I would be pretty pissed too, if you plucked me out of the water moments before setting a world record. Inconsiderate bastard

possibly fake..?

And now I am wondering if scorpions can swim. EDIT: I googled this shit. Sadly every site I read didn't really add up with the previous. What I can deduce from the (not very consistent) information, is that they can hold their breath for quite long. How long is debated. And apparently, they cannot swim. If anyone has actual information better than what I found within a short search, please do share.

23- I used to have an emperor scorpion. He got up to about seven inches long before he died. I don't know if he could swim, but he would lay down and half-way submerge himself in his little water pool. He'd slosh around and dirty up the water, then get back out and go to his den.

Thank you, 30. I had a pet scorpion before but I was so young that I only remember that I found him in the tub, and that he glowed in the blacklight.

Scorpions actually have a defense mechanism where they can shut down almost all of there motor functions, almost in a trance or coma like state. They can remain in this state for quite a long while, and revive themselves when they are free from harm. I knew someone who put one in a cup of bleach for 4 months, when they dumped it out, the scorpion tried to crawl away!

Why would anyone put a scorpion into a cup of bleach?!?!?

42 - I completely agree! Your friends need to re-think the ethical factors of their next experiment. But, at the same time, it's a pretty awesome discovery; I had no idea scorpions were so hardcore!

THIS is scary! Thanks a lot for this information!

NatGeo should do a "Scorpion vs Cockroach" special to see which one can survive more extreme scenarios.

23- I took some time to do a more extensive google search. From what I have read, they can't swim but they can hold their breath for about 6 hours, depending on the species. Yeah, I had nothing better to do but read about scorpions...

This is the most interesting thing I've ever learnt on FML, Thank you.

He probably put it there to kill it in the first place. And obviously he survived because that's how he figured out they can hold their breath for hours making them angry.

38-Awww hell nahhh that shit ain't right!

38- You just reek of bullshit...

"Scorpions are strange animals. They can live for months on a single meal, slowing down their metabolisms until they're practically in suspended animation, yet can spring back to life almost instantly if they detect prey. They can be frozen overnight and thawed out the next day, none the worse for frost bite." Citation: http://adventure.howstuffworks.com/outdoor-activities/hiking/5-critters-camping-in-desert1.htm

I wish I had the ability to slow down my metabolism whenever I wanted. Who knew I'd ever be jealous of a scorpion?

"GET OVER HERE!"

What if Scorpion had kids? "Son, come here." "No! You're just gonna yell at me again!" "Damn it, Douglass, GET OVER HERE!!!" Or: "Eat your vegetables, Kathy." "I don't want to!" "FINISH THEM!"

^( starts choking on food) FATALITY

73 I would feel bad for the children getting stabbed every time they wouldn't listen

Your a dumbass that's not funny

Scorpions are hard to kill.. We once nailed one to a board for 6 weeks and it still lived

Why do you know that?

I'm more curious about the winky-face..

Who wouldn't wink when saying sac? ;)

I didn't even know spiders could breath underwater! This is the most interesting FML ever! :D

I reared spiders when I was a kid (freaky habit I know) but yeah that's how I know.

Spider: ****! Ryan, you busted my taillight! You'd better have some ******* insurance! Ryan: Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there! Spider: Your card says Geico, dumbass!

74 - I imagined it more of a tailpipe issue

Ewe

13- For why? It was just living, doing its scorpion thing. There's no need to kill it.

Personally, I hate scorpions. It's just what I would do.

Cuz it attacked

36- From the scorpion's point of view, OP attacked him. OP picked him up, and in the scorpion's world that means death is coming. He was just defending himself.

How do you know the scorpion is a he? But I thumbed you for your understanding :D

Scorpions are magnificent creatures. No need to kill it. :( Maybe OP should have put it in a container and set it free elsewhere.

19- that's not really a reason.

-stabs op with stinger- That'll teach you to remove me from your pool when I'm trying to set a record you inconsiderate self centered prick.