Miscellaneous: Winds of change

Winds of change

By sting - 03/06/2017 04:00

Today, I stepped on a glue trap for scorpions. Bare foot. There was a scorpion already caught on it. It wasn't dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 055

You deserved it 733

Miscellaneous

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Same thing different taste

By where's the epipen - 23/10/2016 06:41 - United States - Tampa

Today, I accidentally stepped on a dead bee. The stinger was still intact. How do I know? It stung my foot. I'm allergic to bees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 820

You deserved it 886

Spider-man

By Anonymous - 16/10/2019 16:00

Today, I tried to catch a spider in a glass. It was on the paper and I wanted it to fall into the glass, but I moved the paper the wrong way, screeched like a banshee and flung the glass at the floor. I was barefoot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 603

You deserved it 1 299

By juwkgo - 17/02/2010 15:05 - United States

Today, as I was about to leave my house in my brand new heels, I stepped on a dead mouse. My heel went through it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 056

You deserved it 5 587

Alas, poor Kermit

By traumatizedforlife - 05/08/2013 20:21 - United States

Today, I stepped out of the house for some fresh air. It was still dark out, so imagine my horror when I accidentally stepped on a frog. It squealed for a split second before being crushed beneath my uncovered foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 406

You deserved it 6 798

By Unknown - 30/06/2014 01:05 - United States

Today, I found out that the lump under my carpet that I stomped on to flatten was actually a dead frog that had gotten caught in the wrong place at the wrong time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 909

You deserved it 7 199

By AquaKelly - 24/12/2014 01:48 - United States - Newark

Today, I set a trap to catch a mouse that ran across my foot. Not only did the trap shut on my finger twice, but I watched the mouse run over the trap without it snapping shut. I guess I have a new roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 808

You deserved it 4 754

By jillydark6609 - 19/09/2010 06:21 - United States

Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 279

You deserved it 14 251

By Anonytard - 02/03/2014 22:38 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 697

You deserved it 15 119

By Anonymous - 10/11/2011 17:07 - Ireland

Today, I stepped in a pile of dog shit. While trying to get it off by wiping my foot on the grass, I stepped in another pile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 819

You deserved it 7 667

By Anon - 24/03/2012 02:42 - United States

Today, while hiking and wearing sandals, I stubbed my toe. This wouldn't have been so bad had it not been into a cactus with 3 inch thorns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 401

You deserved it 32 274

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 3 June 2017 4:32

Did it rock you like a hurricane?

d3rpb0t 10

Saturday 3 June 2017 4:08

Mortal Kombat: The untold chronicles Seriously though, fyl op, especially if someone else placed them without the consideration of others.

Comments

1DisGR8 32

Saturday 3 June 2017 4:05

That's gotta sting

d3rpb0t 10

Saturday 3 June 2017 4:08

Mortal Kombat: The untold chronicles Seriously though, fyl op, especially if someone else placed them without the consideration of others.

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 3 June 2017 4:32

Did it rock you like a hurricane?

Justine Malang 16

Saturday 3 June 2017 5:19

Ohhhhh damn.

Madrias 36

Saturday 3 June 2017 7:57

What has 8 legs, looks like a lobster crossed with a nightmare, and has the attitude of an angry wasp? Well, it's under your foot.

ghetto_child 19

Saturday 3 June 2017 8:20

If it wasn't dead then, it is now that you've stepped on it

Natanaru 6

Saturday 3 June 2017 11:08

Poor soul. Never been stung by one myself but my grandpa was out for a day when he got stung by one.

Lalala579121 27

Saturday 3 June 2017 11:37

I think "scorpion trap" is the most badass thing I've heard all week.

Glowworm56 26

Saturday 3 June 2017 14:12

I love the FML title for this one!

madlove88 5

Monday 5 June 2017 22:57

oh dang that sucks.

Keywords

Harassment Awkward Coffee Love Mental health Weird Miscellaneous Family Anger issues Sex Confused Cheating My ex Work Social Media Facebook Parenting Health Relatable Babies Creepypasta Nice Guys Religion LGBTQIA+ Food Painful Transportation Intimacy Politics Coworkers

The Top

Today, our family reunion began with my sister calling my brother's current crazy girlfriend by his last crazy girlfriend's name and ended with my dad telling my adopted niece that he wanted a family picture without her in it, but she could be in the next one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 295

You deserved it 811

Today, I was having lunch with my mom before an important job interview. She commented than my lips looked dry and crackly and gave me her chapstick with aloe to put on. Apparently I'm allergic to aloe and my lips got so swollen I could hardly talk. It was too late to reschedule the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 071

You deserved it 2 517

The Top

Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 449

You deserved it 3 318

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Why? Her six old likes me more than her. I hate kids. I stayed with her in spite of her son, because I love her. For some reason she thought I was going to leave her and take her kid with me. So she broke up with me first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 102

You deserved it 279

Today, I found out that when I drink alcohol, I snore so bad my boyfriend contemplated suffocating me with a pillow to get some sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 091

You deserved it 795

Today, my crush confessed their love for me, and I happily told them that I felt the same way. They looked uncomfortable, so I asked why. Apparently they'd been paid to prank me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 473

You deserved it 278

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 090

You deserved it 8 791

Today, after turning in a paper that I worked really hard on, I got it back with a grade of 0. In the feedback section, my professor wrote: “In all my 37 years of teaching, this is by far the worst essay I have ever read.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 632

You deserved it 681

Winds of change

Same thing different taste

Spider-man

Alas, poor Kermit

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