By Anonymous - 26/12/2017 06:00

Today, I learned that my husband is attracted to obese, unhealthy women after celebrating my weight loss of 175lbs and improving my overall health. FML
I agree, your life sucks 5 266
You deserved it 421

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Leviathene 34

You are magnificent for undertaking this big step in your life. You don't need his negativity impacting your health. You need to have a serious talk with him about where you two stand in your relationship, because your health comes first.

So I'm guessing he was still contemplating if he wanted to be with you at the 174 mark, but once you were down 175, he could really see the changes. The best thing you can do is leave him. I am not one of those that call everything abusive, but watching My 300-Pound Life showed me that the people closest to you are your biggest downfall once you start the journey. Husbands will leave their wives because, "she's not fat anymore. She's getting too skinny even though she's still 200 lbs overweight." It's their own insecurities, mostly. Having lost 80 pounds, I can tell you that if I was in a relationship where my husband doesn't FULLY support my getting healthy, I would be out. My life is worth more than you wanting to get off to an obese woman. And yes, he has a preference for bigger women (because I know some will defend him), but she didn't lose the weight overnight. He has every right to like whatever, but it seems like OP is surprised at the turn of events.

Comments

So I'm guessing he was still contemplating if he wanted to be with you at the 174 mark, but once you were down 175, he could really see the changes. The best thing you can do is leave him. I am not one of those that call everything abusive, but watching My 300-Pound Life showed me that the people closest to you are your biggest downfall once you start the journey. Husbands will leave their wives because, "she's not fat anymore. She's getting too skinny even though she's still 200 lbs overweight." It's their own insecurities, mostly. Having lost 80 pounds, I can tell you that if I was in a relationship where my husband doesn't FULLY support my getting healthy, I would be out. My life is worth more than you wanting to get off to an obese woman. And yes, he has a preference for bigger women (because I know some will defend him), but she didn't lose the weight overnight. He has every right to like whatever, but it seems like OP is surprised at the turn of events.

Wow, haven't written this much on here before, this one really annoyed me.

I couldn't have said it better myself! I knew a guy who preferes bigger girls and I had lost 50 pounds and he had stopped talking to me. So ignorant and rude! But we do it for ourselves, not for them. We want to be healthy and look good for us to make us feel better. But preach it girl! You took the words right out of my mouth.

Leviathene 34

You are magnificent for undertaking this big step in your life. You don't need his negativity impacting your health. You need to have a serious talk with him about where you two stand in your relationship, because your health comes first.

First of all, how do you not know your spouse's type? Everybody has one. Also, nowhere in here does it say he isn't still attracted to you or that he put you down.

Are you the person who can't take a hint when somebody doesn't want to talk to you? Do they have to spell it out? It clearly states that OP lost 175 and her husband is attracted to bigger women. So clearly OP isn't considered near her death bed enough for her husband.

ThatGuy9679 13
Friesian 7

It’s possible you losing weight makes him feel insecure or afraid of you becoming more independent. I know some men that go after ugly or large women because they think they don’t have to really worry about anyone else wanting her, so she won’t ever leave him (my former best friend comes to mind). He may be afraid of you leaving him now. Or if he’s a big boy could possibly be super jelly of your weight loss.

Congrats on all your hard work to improve your health and lose weight/fat. I am surprised that your husband's preference for obese women didn't come out during your journey; I mean, he had to see notice that you were getting smaller, didn't he? He didn't say anything before you reached that goal? If he's not attracted to you, you may have to end the relationship. You lost 175 pounds. Losing a couple hundred more shouldn't be a problem.

Congrats on losing the weight and being healthier. I would query if you were big when you met your husband, since that was probably a clue, and his reaction in the bedroom might have been another... It's probably time you sit down and have a chat about your future together.

thatslifeiguess7 16

Well get a good lawyer, a divorce and find a woman seriously women are better

Not everyone looks good when they lose the weight. Just sayin'

Just for the record, you may have been unhealthy and obese, but not all fat people are unhealthy. Many overweight people are not unhealthy, they're just fat, and while that my have some medical conditions tacked on in the distant future that doesn't mean anything. However, good on you for doing what you want in life, even if you weren't unhealthy you decided to change your lifestyle and work on yourself. He is allowed to feel and be attracted to whomever he wants. It may feel terrible, but if y'all aren't compatible anymore then look into moving on.

You don't need him, you're worth more than that