Today, I had to make a deal with my 22 year old fiancé. What was the deal? If he put deodorant on, he could squeeze my boob for as long as he liked. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was fooling around with my husband on the bed. I was excited as he lifted my arms up in a seductive way, only to roll deodorant under my armpits. FML
Today, I had to stop my 26 year old fiancé from picking his nose and eating it like a little boy. Three times. FML
Today, I had to tell my 30 year-old boyfriend to take a shower, or else he won't for a week. FML
Today, my boyfriend's farts got so bad that we made a deal: every day that he doesn't fart, he gets a blowjob. Suddenly, he's not letting gas out anymore. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend whilst straddled on top of him. He started to undo my bra. I was fine with this but he stopped kissing me and looked at me with a slight smile. He then said, "I know this is going to kill the mood... but I feel like I could milk your boobs right now" FML
Today, I had to use anti-perspirant deodorant under my breasts. FML
Today, I had to use antiperspirant deodorant under my breasts. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend was kind enough to give me prescription strength deodorant. FML
Today, my fiancé hugged me so tight that I couldn't move, said he loved me, let out a loud, obnoxious and smelly fart cloud and made me breathe it in. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend had bought me sexy lingerie for our anniversary. However, they're for for a bigger bust. When I asked if I could return it for the right size, he asked me to get a boob job to fit the bra instead. FML
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Top comments
PFiddy 0
all the inspiration a guy needs
srhshl 9
1 percent inspiration, 99 percent perspiration.
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Comments (189)
LordGoober 13
Oh fruit = trying, just called websters and got the definition changed (my bad grammar nazis)
The_Weirdo 10
I want the original one. I've never heard of this "Noiloveboners"
liy223 6
such class...
perdix 29
Which boob, left or right? If I only got to squeeze one boob, I'd only deodorize one pit.
McCarter54 0
I just stopped wearin deodorant. lol. good plan.
demonsla 0
I wonder what he gets for showering lol
metalmafia 0
BJs
The_Weirdo 10
So how about them tities boners?
sansan2 0
im guna stop wearing deoderant now!
Thundercleese 0
all "my bf/GF sucks" posts are completely the fault of the poster. dump him and stop whining.
torycross1 0
yeah