Today, I had a swollen knee, and was slowly limping to the toilet. All of a sudden, my mom ran past me, beating me to it. As she closed the door, she said, "AT LEAST I CAN RUN!" FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, my mother called me urgently from the kitchen. Thinking she was hurt, I ran to her as fast as possible. She threw a wet cloth at my head and ran away, laughing her face off. FML
Today, I came home from a knee surgery. I asked my mother to get me a glass of water. She replied, "You can get it, you're not crippled. Oh wait, yeah you are!" and laughed hysterically. FML
Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML
Unbelievable
Today, I slipped and fell down the stairs, landing hard on my knee. Through my screams of agony, my mom accused me of exaggerating the pain, and said I was just being an attention seeker, before finally taking me to hospital. I was told my leg was broken. She refused to apologize. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs. My mom came running from the other room because she thought it was the dog. She rolled her eyes and walked away when she saw it was me. FML
Today, as I was walking home, I saw an ambulance pull into my driveway with its sirens blaring. Thinking it could be for my sick father, I started frantically sprinting. I managed to trip on my pant-leg, twisting my ankle in the process. They were just turning around in my driveway. FML
Today, I had debilitating stomach cramps and told my mom, but she said she was too tired to take me to the ER. I had appendicitis. Thanks Mom. FML
Today, I went on a run. Going a decent pace, I passed a woman walking her dog. I joked, "C'mon! Keep up!" Thirty feet later I stepped in mud, rolled my ankle and fell. The woman walked by as I lay in agony, and told me to keep up. FML
Priorities
Today, I broke my toe and screamed, "Fuck!" My mom heard and yelled at me for swearing, while I laid on the floor in pain. FML
Today, I walked across my kitchen to go get my mom a blanket after she shoveled snow. I slipped and caught the kitchen chair with my side, landed on the floor and almost fracturing my knee cap. She then told me she wasn't cold. FML
Top comments
kateheartswaffle 0
She sounds..nice?
Samberriee 9
Go for her Achilles next time, dawg.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (184)
Okayitwasme 0
It depends if it was a #1 or 2. If you were dropping a turd then sorry YDI. If you were simply draining the snake so to speak than fYL!
mama2b3 20
That's ****** up!
braunerzucker58 10
you shoulda shat on her bed....
taco_bender 12
Hahaha ur mom got u good, dont mess up ur knee next time
linkinpark98 23
That isn't really a choice. What happens, happens. Douche.
Track1991 0
What a nonconcered mom. Kick her in the knee!
pandakota 0
Were you playing Skyrim? lol
AllyC1023 4
I hope all you skyrim players take an arrow to the head. I mean damn. Hahaha Sorry about your knee OP
PeeNaught 3
I'm so damn sick of these parents who think they're so damn clever or funny and in reality they're ******* epic failures in some way or another...dear mom and dad, you're not funny clever or anything else so knock it off already. Sincerely, your ******* beyond irritated kid...PS in case you're not smart enough to notice with as long as you been alive karma IS A BIG BITCH!!!
nathanc3433 7
Actually seems like a fun mom.
clyde1974 0
Just remind her you could be the one to pick her retirement home in the future. 4 star rating or 0 star rating.