Work wives are common. But talking to you less and her more is a problem for your marriage. Communication is a pillar in marriage. Express your concerns in a way where you are not pointing fingers. Or it could get to the point where he’ll end up saying “She was there for me.” And they’ve already started dipping their toes in affair land. We’re all allowed to have friends. But when that friendship jeopardizes the marriage. Is it really only friendship?

my first reaction is red flag. if he has nothing to hide, ask him to have her meet you two for drinks one night. if he refuses, somethings off. if it happens, you can judge the situation from there.

So, how was your day? Turnabout is fair play.

There's a very good book that is often recommended when one spouse is spending time with someone of the opposite sex (or same sex if they're gay, I assume) who they describe as "Just a friend". It's "Not Just Friends", by Shirley Glass. The subtitle of the book and the book cover will lead you to believe that it's a book for couples where one partner has had, or is having, an affair. However, in actuality, most of the book is about the dangers of the modern workplace and internet, about how people start out as friends and then gradually come to rely on each other emotionally, until finally the do have an affair. It's got lots of useful advice about warning signs, how to set and enforce appropriate boundaries, etc. It's one of the top two or three books that routinely gets recommended on infidelity forums.