Today, I got to be an innocent victim caught in the middle of a farting war between my boyfriend and my 10-year-old son. I fear my sense of smell will never recover. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML
Today, I accidentally scared my one year-old son with my huge, smelly fart that was really loud. He now won't come near me without crying. FML
Today, I was talking to this boy I really like and we were laughing together, until I got this disgusting putrid smell. I started to say how awful the smell was and he stopped laughing to take a sniff too. As soon as he closed his mouth the smell was gone. FML
Today, my boyfriend endearingly told me that he's been taking advantage of my inability to smell due to a head cold, and he's been farting around me whenever he pleases. FML
Today, after an argument, my boyfriend called me a fart knocker and gave me a wedgie. Apparently, I'm dating an 10-year-old. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML
Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML
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Top comments
obviousboy 8
That stinks.
iAmScrubs 19
When you can't beat them, join them.
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Comments (122)
HolaJessicaHola 0
I don't really understand why you didn't stop at least your son...
OfficeNinja 5
Women will never understand the politics of a fart war. It is a competition, and a cornerstone of male bonding. I'm pretty sure cavemen picked the cave leader based on the results of fart wars. Last man out of the cave is the chief.
smarie98 1
Just tell them that they have to clean it up when one of them ***** their pants.
Fletchdads 9
30 it clearly says son.
Aceman120 2
lol its a shake down!
RedPillSucks 33
They do, but no one has ever heard/smelled it and lived to tell. Those sneaky bitches...
RedPillSucks 33
Congratulations on having two boys.
CheckMyProfile 17
@3-Yeah, farts can bring people together! :&
CheckMyProfile 17
Seriously, you need to buy the most effective air freshener, otherwise you're going to suffocate to death, OP
periwinkle95 10
Girls don't fart. God put an ROF in their bodies. ROF stands for "Restriction of Farting"! Duhh, everyone knows that! (:
rezzrhyme 0
aww cute they are bonding lol