Today, I got into an argument with my wife over how she spends too much time with her gay best friend. Now she says that if I want to ever get intimate with her again, I'll have to let her watch as I give him a striptease. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
What goes around…
Today, my wife demanded that I cut all ties with my best friend, just because she doesn't like the jokes he tells. Now she's bitching that she's upset because his wife, who she works with, is talking about her. FML
Creepy
Today, I had a huge argument with my wife because I declined a lunch invite with a married couple who live nearby. My wife has severe social anxiety, so having a friend nearby is a huge win for her. What my wife doesn’t know is that her new friend keeps hitting on me, and has already sent me unsolicited nudes. FML
Permission granted and rejected
Today, my wife lost interest in sex a long time ago. I’ve tried to reignite her interest lately, which culminated in an argument where she gave me permission to go out and shag other women. We might as well divorce at this point if she’s going to say things like that. FML
Make your mind up
Today, I had threesome with my wife and her best friend. Now my wife is mad at me for sleeping with her best friend. FML
Today, my husband and I got into a fight about his pervert friend who regularly shows blatant disrespect for our marriage, including sending me inappropriate texts. Apparently this friend should have my full trust, and apparently I am the one with the issue for not excusing his bad behavior. FML
Healthy relationship goals
Today, my husband told me to stop being friends with my best guy friend because I won't let him hang out with his ex. FML
Not sure that's how it works
Today, after getting sick of my boyfriend pestering me for a threesome, I invited a male friend over. My boyfriend strongly declined, because, "Hell no, I ain’t gay." So this man expects me to be a lesbian, but him being gay is a problem. FML
Today, I found out that my wife has been having an affair with the guy who's been trying to get our relationship back on track. FML
What are you doing?
Today, I started doing a striptease for my husband. He asked me to stop. FML
Sounds like a sitcom
Today, I had to warn the decorator we hired to stop being inappropriate with my wife or I’d fire his ass. Turns out not only is he gay, like super gay with his husband on Facebook, he’s also my wife’s old college buddy. He started crying on our sofa and my wife hit me with her handbag. FML
Top comments
k8izgr8_fml 0
well OP what's more important to you? your pride and masculinity, or getting laid? START UNDRESSING
Jakesterk96 8
Get a lesbian and make her your best friend, problem solved.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (250)
zombicidal 11
inbreeding is the only logical explanation
Yak99 0
Its easier to write your than you're
gravygecko 2
She is withholding sex until you humiliate yourself in front of her and her best friend? File for divorce. She's an awful, manipulative woman who appears to delight in emasculating you. It's funny to see all the people saying it's no big deal and that you should just do it, but I suspect they would be organizing a lynch mob if it was a man telling his wife that he would withhold affection until she did a strip tease for his best friend.
KiddNYC1O 22
Man up lol.
ctlnaaia71 8
gay friend? he's screwing your wife and now he wants a threesome! I bet he's bisexual and he got a taste of her, you're the next one on his list. Get a good attorney and divorce that bitch!
StalinsHeir 1
Well if you agree to this where will it end? (I'm referring to the blackmailing. I'd rather not think about how a strip tease for a bloody poofta will end)
NCSMITH 5
I would find a lesbian friend and play your wife's game.
mikeymayhem_87 15
Fyl indeed.... Talk to her about it or divorce her ass if she spends way too much time with her gay bestie and doesn't care otherwise
Sookie0113 13
HEY I WOULD DO IT , it would make you sex life intresting
legresley85 1
it's not gay in a three way, kidding. Your wife should consider your feelings in this. Dont make out with her gay friend but maybe just get to know him better. If you become friends with him too it might make your wife spend more time with her other friends.