Today, I got into an argument with my wife over how she spends too much time with her gay best friend. Now she says that if I want to ever get intimate with her again, I'll have to let her watch as I give him a striptease. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
What goes around…
Today, my wife demanded that I cut all ties with my best friend, just because she doesn't like the jokes he tells. Now she's bitching that she's upset because his wife, who she works with, is talking about her. FML
Creepy
Today, I had a huge argument with my wife because I declined a lunch invite with a married couple who live nearby. My wife has severe social anxiety, so having a friend nearby is a huge win for her. What my wife doesn’t know is that her new friend keeps hitting on me, and has already sent me unsolicited nudes. FML
Permission granted and rejected
Today, my wife lost interest in sex a long time ago. I’ve tried to reignite her interest lately, which culminated in an argument where she gave me permission to go out and shag other women. We might as well divorce at this point if she’s going to say things like that. FML
Make your mind up
Today, I had threesome with my wife and her best friend. Now my wife is mad at me for sleeping with her best friend. FML
Today, my husband and I got into a fight about his pervert friend who regularly shows blatant disrespect for our marriage, including sending me inappropriate texts. Apparently this friend should have my full trust, and apparently I am the one with the issue for not excusing his bad behavior. FML
Healthy relationship goals
Today, my husband told me to stop being friends with my best guy friend because I won't let him hang out with his ex. FML
Not sure that's how it works
Today, after getting sick of my boyfriend pestering me for a threesome, I invited a male friend over. My boyfriend strongly declined, because, "Hell no, I ain’t gay." So this man expects me to be a lesbian, but him being gay is a problem. FML
Today, I found out that my wife has been having an affair with the guy who's been trying to get our relationship back on track. FML
What are you doing?
Today, I started doing a striptease for my husband. He asked me to stop. FML
Sounds like a sitcom
Today, I had to warn the decorator we hired to stop being inappropriate with my wife or I’d fire his ass. Turns out not only is he gay, like super gay with his husband on Facebook, he’s also my wife’s old college buddy. He started crying on our sofa and my wife hit me with her handbag. FML
Top comments
k8izgr8_fml 0
well OP what's more important to you? your pride and masculinity, or getting laid? START UNDRESSING
Jakesterk96 8
Get a lesbian and make her your best friend, problem solved.
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Comments (250)
bcan 3
Time to call the lawyer and file some papers
FrankHotpants 31
No ****
lo0ovebug 0
Not gunna lie, that's really weird.
WeTodEd 5
So when's the divorce!?
WeTodEd 5
Your best friend is supposed to be you wife/ husband
huntingsucks 4
I would be filing for divorce right about now if I were you
GlitterAngel 8
Tell her if u end up liking him it's her problem.
TheRealArnold_fml 1
Burn the gay
warmmilk 1
It's amazing to me how hard people are trying to be ok with gays... If a woman posted on here that she confronted her husband about spending to much time with his friends and his reply was she had to strip for them, everyone on here would be saying what an asswipe the husband is... But since it's the woman, and there's a gay guy involved... OMG gay, we have to side with gay OMG, you're such a homophobe... Pathetic
millz94 1
don't do itt!!! next time you and your wife get intimate bet you see his smile!