Maybe he will break a leg while acting

Yeah, that's the ACT, not acting. It's a standardized test in the US similar to the SAT.

Bleh

whoops :p

Aren't SAts in year six so correct me if I'm wrong but that would be a 10 year old having sex riiiiiight....

Yeah 24, you're wrong. This FML is from the US.

ACTs are usually taken as a Jr. or Sr. in high school. They can be taken later but they usually don't regard your score after h.s. as highly as they do your in school one. At least, this is what my old school counselor told me. Op I was told the exact same thing. He said it to not hurt my feelings but it actually just hurt worse.

38 - If it helps we can put post it notes all over his car

He's long gone by now. Left me with a baby though. Lol So I think he deserves a little more than sticky notes. :P but that's a good start. & can we draw dicks on the sticky notes? Vainy, hairy diseased dicks?

1 because he is still breathing.

THANK YOU SMARTY MC SMART ASS!

45 - How about all the used diapers you've had to change and he's missed doing.

Oh man. I'm still 8 months pregnant so he's got a lot of diapers coming to him. Plus the hundreds I've had to pay for said diapers & baby things. Haha he deserves every last veiny, hairy, post-it note dick he gets.

52 - still not personal enough. Now get a medical report with his picture on it stating it is diseased or disfigured now you're talking.

Could post flyers around town with that on it. Hmmm...

Think bigger the Internet is your friend, we've got your back. Also what gender is the baby and do you have a name picked out? :) He's the one missing out. Good luck.

Wow, you are hella cute to be left like that. Be strong :)

RainbowHeadache, when that baby comes, you take good care of it and save all the diapers after you change it. Then, when you have around 25, you throw them at his car! and when he comes to FML to complain WE ALL PRESS YDI!!! MWHAHAHA!

Thank you guys. :) It's a boy & his name is Dexter Alexander. No not named after either show. Lol & 25 diapers would be a three day wait. They go through about 8 a day. Give or take a few. I could have a dumpster truck full by the end of a few months. Then back up to his car & dump my kids presents all over it. Preferably while he's in the car so he has to get out & into the mess. :D

i would start off pourung sugar into the gas tank, so its stuck on the screen and he cant have gas withought taking his car apart, and it soaks and disolves resulting in engine problems because of sugar+gas mix

pouring* without* my phone is a dumbass

100 - it would be fitting if it was named after the show...

Rainbowhead- light your baby's used diaper with the "chocolate" inside and leave it on his doorstep, if he has one. that'll show him! ;)

yes lets all gang up on the guy despite not knowing what actually happened here...le sigh.

It dont matter THE GUY left her thats his child im not talking about op im talking about the guy that left his girl with his child

147 - I agree. Let's get the ex in here to get both sides... I'll also book Steve from the springer show just incase too

We dated for almost three years and I got preg. He split saying he can't do the whole dad thing because it will ruin his life and he won't be able to go to college or do anything he wants to do. That enough story for you? You have such a vendetta against me, nutritionist. He even made the comment of "I've thought about pushing you down the stairs." and was dead serious.

Here's a thought RainbowHeadache (nice name btw) mail him every used diaper so that he has to deal with the shit too...

It's ok we all will be the real father. There's nothing he can't learn on the Internet. Plus you have the added benefit that most of us are actual men(even some of the girls) instead of well... That thing that knocked you up. I need a nickname for him or something... 30 seconds of fury for a life time of love.

aka Suck A** Test

rainbowheadache, you sound way too cool a person ( from your bio) to leave and it's totally his loss! you're going to have a little boy soon and even though the bad stuff is there ( nappies, crying, feeding) there's also all the good, and your ex is going to miss out on it all! he's a loser and you can better :) btw, I get the dexter reference but Alexander? what's that got to do with tv? is it an American thing? I hope you have a happy healthy baby :) nice hair btw :) j oh and OP, that sucks too! back massages for nothing... pfft!

Thank you very much. :) I was saying either show because of the show Dexter and the show Dexters Laboratory. Ive already gotten quite a few "Oh like the show Dexter??!" from people when they find out his name. Alexander just fit really well as a middle name. I'm a picky namer. Haha

oooh! aha I get it. it's a nice name :) not like apple or anything weird aha. and you're welcome :)

I swear guys can be so stupid. Had my first boy a lil over a month before I turn 18. At first he wanted me to get an abortion but when I told him no he stepped up. Only to later to be talking to every other girl, going out with them, sending em pics. He says he got robbed of his teenage years.... So did I. He wasn't the one up all night watching a baby and going to school. We didn't live together so I did it on my own for a while. He got to sleep in on the weekends, sleep through the night, not have to change diapers. not sure how that stole his teenage years, it stole mine. Then we got married and had another baby 14 months later. Still talked to other girls, went out with them, etc. Some guys just don't grow up. Diiiivorrrrrce.

You should get a picture of Blue Waffle (STD) and blow it up, super glue it to his car and in big Sharpie write that he has it and it's incurable.

Yeh, every diaper. Every evening pour a Lil bit of gasoline on each one, put em in a paper bag and toss a match to it when you're far enough away to not get burned

YDI. Guys do not like backrubs.

We don't? ****! You mean I have to tell my wife to stop giving them to me? Goddammit, why am I always the last to know? You're an idiot and a threadjacker. Cut it out.

I've been too embarrassed to ask this but, what is thread jacking. I hope I haven't been doing it. >.

Thread jacking is when a person replies to a comment but isn't responding to their comment. They just do it to be on top. It's like cutting in front of a long grocery line. Ballsy! But "some" people I don't mind them doing it. Especially, the regular FUNNIER ones.

Ok, well I try to be funny, and also try to reply to all comments but on my phone it's hard... hell even on my computer it's a little confusing... I'm a little noob. :(

You're a little noob? THE ****.

Haha I like it when my girl gives me one-.-

He's a freaking douchebag. OP, he's probably cheating on u. Or was

I love back rubs. I always ask for one

Doesn't matter, had sex.

But I cried the whole time!

Best 30 seconds of my life.

She might have been a racist.

She put a bag over my head!

Still counts

This is a funny reply! Maybe the sex was better for you than him.

Still Counts!

She kept looking at her watch

Damn Combo Breakers.

C-c-c-c-combo breaker

I just had sex...and it felt soo good :)

She tied me up and bent me over! Must I go on.........

She let me wear my chain and my turtleneck sweater

Umm... yeah it does matter. good or bad sex makes a difference.

I think she was a racist.

Not at all. ACT's are a big deal and so is senior year of high school with all college applications.

Idk, I thought act's were pretty easy. It's the sat's that are a bitch.

It's like a Capri Sun. You take and take and take. Then when you get to the last bit you squeeze every last bit of the Fruit Punch out before realizing you ain't getting shit from it anymore. Then it's tossed in the garbage and you grab a new one.

oh thanx..and each time he is a bit stressed he is allowed to break up again?

Sex without head is like a meatpie without any sauce

Both is better. L2sex.

@32 you have a knack for assuming your preferences are universal dont you?

Nah, he just got all he wanted out of you. :

She already did...

Touché

She did **** the little ******.

So does that include not expecting to get dumped in return?

No amount of favors will keep a person that doesn't want to be in a relationship in a relationship.

Fishing is a good way to relieve stress, OPs ex should go fishing, perhaps with OP.

Doc... Is that you...?

No. Someone hacked my account. I mean I hacked his account. Or something.