Health, Accident, Tattoos and Animals: Today, I got a free temporary tattoo of a scorpion in a packet...

By Anonymous - 29/10/2009 05:15 - Australia

Today, I got a free temporary tattoo of a scorpion in a packet of potato chips and decided to wear it on my wrist. Whilst I was in the shower, I got a shock, thinking it was a spider. I then lost balance and slipped, banging my head on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 308

You deserved it 43 566

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/03/2010 20:30 - United States

Today, while taking a shower, a spider fell from the ceiling onto my foot. I took down my shower head to wash it down the drain, and in the process, got soap in my eye and rammed my head into the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 653

You deserved it 8 334

Chill out

By HURP - 17/06/2015 15:41 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I wore a sleeveless shirt for the first time in years, when I glimpsed something on my shoulder that looked like a spider. I let out a scream that sounded like a donkey having a stroke, and flailed my arms. Then I realized it was my tattoo, and that I was freaking out everyone on the bus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 090

You deserved it 13 154

He was just chillin'

By Anonymous - 04/07/2021 13:59

Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 989

Monster in my bathroom

By Thescarlettfox - 16/02/2020 01:00

Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 450

You deserved it 871

Bath time [GONE WRONG][CREEPYPASTA]

By noname - 27/12/2008 04:07 - France

Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 302

You deserved it 23 894

Freakout

By emmey - 23/07/2009 19:43 - United States

Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I'm allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist, and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 916

You deserved it 44 866

By buttercup92 - 31/05/2016 03:45 - United States - San Antonio

Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 945

You deserved it 1 160

By Anonymous - 18/10/2011 06:55 - United States

Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 227

You deserved it 41 614

Panic! In the Bathroom

By MAWZ - 19/07/2011 06:33 - United States

Today, while I was showering, my brother thought it would be funny to burst through the door pretending he was a burglar. Panicked, I went to grab the soap bar as a weapon, slipped, fell, and hit my head on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 742

You deserved it 5 152

Juicy breakfast

By Anonymous - 07/01/2022 01:01 - Canada - Warman

Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 042

You deserved it 150

AliMarie 0

Thursday 29 October 2009 15:01

Uh. . .this just confuses me.

Tribulations 0

Thursday 29 October 2009 15:18

That is undoubtedly the worst tattoo ever worn by anyone ever.

Comments

andcob 1

Saturday 31 October 2009 1:46

bullshit nobody says faucet in australia, probably lying or from america or they are just a ******, and people who type 911 instead of 000 thts just stupid

yehr 0

Monday 30 November 2009 13:05

ever thought she might have said faucet because she thought this was an American site and didn't think they would know what a tap was ????

aussieoioioi 0

Saturday 31 October 2009 8:35

#71 People do say faucet And people that dial 911 are not necessarily stupid. We watch so much american tv and movies that people get the facts mixed up. I personally know someone whos never been to america, is of asian ancestry, lives in australia and has a full american accent from being brought up watching american tv and movies. And i can tell you now, she definately is not a ****** or stupid. Shes probably twice as smart as you are and a lot less ignorant.

ginwl 0

Saturday 31 October 2009 13:31

Ha ha, that did make me laugh though.

DefyingGravity 0

Saturday 31 October 2009 16:00

How old ARE you?

rachelbrianna25 0

Sunday 1 November 2009 20:06

lmao!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MAN!! u must be the brightest one in the fixture.

hoff90 0

Wednesday 4 November 2009 2:21

uhhhhh, wtf is this? randomness...... also, a faucet is part of a sink not a shower... in any part of the world

marshmallowmouse 0

Thursday 5 November 2009 9:02

If it's a shower that doubles as a tub, the spout where water comes out above the drain and below the shower head is called the FAUCET. Problem solved.

ThatsFunnyFunny 0

Thursday 5 November 2009 0:41

That's STUPID

yehr 0

Monday 30 November 2009 12:58

ditto

Isamermaid 17

Friday 9 April 2010 4:41

I have a real tattoo of a scorpion on my leg. It's pretty badass and realistic-looking. I find scorpions and spiders all the time in my laundry. Once, a scorpion was on a sock I'd just washed... it stung me when I picked up the sock. Since then, I've been known as the Scorpion King. I mean Queen.