Today, I got a free temporary tattoo of a scorpion in a packet of potato chips and decided to wear it on my wrist. Whilst I was in the shower, I got a shock, thinking it was a spider. I then lost balance and slipped, banging my head on the faucet. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, while taking a shower, a spider fell from the ceiling onto my foot. I took down my shower head to wash it down the drain, and in the process, got soap in my eye and rammed my head into the wall. FML
Today, I wore a sleeveless shirt for the first time in years, when I glimpsed something on my shoulder that looked like a spider. I let out a scream that sounded like a donkey having a stroke, and flailed my arms. Then I realized it was my tattoo, and that I was freaking out everyone on the bus. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML
Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I'm allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist, and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML
Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML
Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML
Today, while I was showering, my brother thought it would be funny to burst through the door pretending he was a burglar. Panicked, I went to grab the soap bar as a weapon, slipped, fell, and hit my head on the faucet. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
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Top comments
AliMarie 0
Uh. . .this just confuses me.
Tribulations 0
That is undoubtedly the worst tattoo ever worn by anyone ever.
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Comments (100)
meyanna 0
You kinda deserved it, but that's funny shit, and we've all done that kinda crap beofre.
Cristaderzi 0
Lol Funny!
Chaos_Faction 0
a perfect example of a misplaced modifier =)
urbanlover 3
this made my day. probably because it's definitely something i would do:)
yehr 0
LMAO same!!
aussieoioioi 0
LOOOLLLL!!! Yaaayy australians ftw (: Bahaha i love how all the extremely stoopid things come from aus (: National prideee. :D
Purplehazeglass 9
NSW forever!!!!!!!!
aksteve 4
I didn't know they have electric spiders in Australia
Niv_fml 0
LIES AND SLANDER! if you were Australian you'd call it a tap not a faucet >.>
dietcreamsoda 0
YDI for saying "whilst".
aussieoioioi 0
#68 Mate, just because they dont write tap, doesnt mean theyre not australian I know heaps of peeps that use 'faucet' instead of 'tap'. Faucet may be an american word BUT languages are becoming mingled through the internet like this. Its sort of the same as people in australia dialing 911 for an ambulance instead of 000.