Today, I gave my sister a stun gun for her birthday since she recently had a couple "close calls" walking home from work late at night. She was so excited and thankful that she wanted to express her gratitude by shocking me to see if it really worked. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I gave my girlfriend a small stun gun I bought for her. She mentioned how she thought it was ''cute'', though it probably wouldn't help if someone was after her. She then put the tazer to my chest. When I woke up, she told me how it was my fault, for buying it for her. FML
Ouchies
Today, I got tased, with the same TASER I bought my girlfriend to use on people trying to rob her. FML
Zapped
Today, my mom decided to try her new taser on me while I was asleep on the couch. FML
Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired, so I decided to test it on myself. It worked. FML
Today, I gave my wife a birthday present. For months she'd been talking about an expensive treadmill that she wanted, so I bought it. Her reaction when she saw it was to yell, "YOU THINK I'M FAT!" and burst into tears. FML
Hand it over
Today, my girlfriend totally emasculated me and made me a laughing stock when we got mugged and, instead of just handing over her purse like the guy said, she took out a stun gun and used it on him while I freaked out and cried. Now all my friends are laughing at me. FML
Brown and sticky
Today, I came home a day after my birthday, and was greeted by my mother who told me, "Oh, I have birthday present for you." She explained that she and my father went on a hike, and handed me my present. I got a fucking stick for my birthday. FML
Today, my parents thought it would be a great surprise to accidentally shoot me in the leg for my birthday. FML
It's not what you think!
Today, I bought my daughter a rape alarm after she had a near-miss with a creep following her to her part-time job. As soon as I handed it to her in the car park, she accidentally set it off and one of her coworkers put me in a rather painful headlock and threw me to the ground, breaking my arm. FML
Today, I received an email from my friend in South Africa, with whom I'll soon be staying for 2 months. She was telling me that she had bought me a few things so I would be prepared for my stay. What did she buy me? A taser and some pepper-spray. FML
Top comments
24788 7
Lol, I love this one. I'd so do that to my friend. :)
farmgirl 3
#4 - not even real guns are illegal... and that's really funny, i would have done the same thing
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Comments (108)
MKC_fml 0
LOL what are siblings for if not to test potentially deadly weapons?
circayouandme 0
Ha ha ha ha. At least u know it works! (=
Casezilla 0
Then you took it back, got her wtih it, and broke up with her for being so dumb?
Shotta 3
Never give women stun guns! Or any type of weapons. Never know when they might go crazy.
ThatsAli3 0
ha ha. at least you're thoughtful = )
y0ur_life_sucks 0
and #79 would you like to explain to me how he is supposed to break up with his sister? next time you comment you might want to think about what you say so you dont sound like a total douche
Epiphany1882 0
ok, that sounds like something my sister would do..... I miss her :( lol This was funny as shit tho. Good for you for getting something for her to protect herself with, and I have to wonder if maybe she was getting back at you for something........lol
FKO 0
tell her u want a pistol for your birthday and then try it out on her to see if it works
alex_vik 1
#77 - I doubt OP is from the south if they can afford stun guns.
EG_dod 0
Ouch! Just be glad it was not a real gun.