Today, I gave my sister a stun gun for her birthday since she recently had a couple "close calls" walking home from work late at night. She was so excited and thankful that she wanted to express her gratitude by shocking me to see if it really worked. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I gave my girlfriend a small stun gun I bought for her. She mentioned how she thought it was ''cute'', though it probably wouldn't help if someone was after her. She then put the tazer to my chest. When I woke up, she told me how it was my fault, for buying it for her. FML
Today, I got tased, with the same TASER I bought my girlfriend to use on people trying to rob her. FML
Today, my mom decided to try her new taser on me while I was asleep on the couch. FML
Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired, so I decided to test it on myself. It worked. FML
Today, I gave my wife a birthday present. For months she'd been talking about an expensive treadmill that she wanted, so I bought it. Her reaction when she saw it was to yell, "YOU THINK I'M FAT!" and burst into tears. FML
Today, my girlfriend totally emasculated me and made me a laughing stock when we got mugged and, instead of just handing over her purse like the guy said, she took out a stun gun and used it on him while I freaked out and cried. Now all my friends are laughing at me. FML
Today, I came home a day after my birthday, and was greeted by my mother who told me, "Oh, I have birthday present for you." She explained that she and my father went on a hike, and handed me my present. I got a fucking stick for my birthday. FML
Today, my parents thought it would be a great surprise to accidentally shoot me in the leg for my birthday. FML
Today, I bought my daughter a rape alarm after she had a near-miss with a creep following her to her part-time job. As soon as I handed it to her in the car park, she accidentally set it off and one of her coworkers put me in a rather painful headlock and threw me to the ground, breaking my arm. FML
Today, I received an email from my friend in South Africa, with whom I'll soon be staying for 2 months. She was telling me that she had bought me a few things so I would be prepared for my stay. What did she buy me? A taser and some pepper-spray. FML
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Top comments
24788 7
Lol, I love this one. I'd so do that to my friend. :)
farmgirl 3
#4 - not even real guns are illegal... and that's really funny, i would have done the same thing
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Comments (108)
clampy4x4 0
Get over it. It doesn't hurt for too long. We used to do it with a 750 Volt taser when we were drunk just for fun.
DangIt94 0
OMG! Thats ****** Hilarious!!! hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
datstud21 0
I wulda did dat too LOL I wulda thought it was rack...but funny:)..FYL
Miss_Tyff 0
Wow, what an awesome sister for doing that... But that was really sweet of you to give that to her, however, most states you have to have a license to carry one of those (just like a gun) (At least where I live you do, because I was going to buy myself one before...they're about as expensive as most guns too)
Fml37 0
Don't give someone like that a weapon
sjx 0
The reasoning behind everyone being permitted to own/owning a gun is that criminals know how to get guns regardless of whether or not they are legal. When outlawed, criminals have the upper hand because law-abiding citizens do not have a weapon, while the criminals do. If everyone owned a gun, or could at least reasonably be expected to own a gun, it would be likely that, if a criminal was to pull a gun on an innocent person, that person would just as easily pull a gun on them in self-defense. Therefore, it would be quite stupid for someone to pull a gun on another person who would likely have a gun as well.
zissou319 0
Awwww CRAP #68 beat me to it, it was the first thing I though too!
lifeofpain 0
ydi for not buying her a car instead ?!
LlamaFragments 0
In the future, give gift cards to self-defense supply stores instead of the weapons themselves.
justinr9987 0
That sucks you should have had her find a drunk friend to try it on, I bought one for my girlfriends its 400,000 volts, and I have another one that is 1,000,000 volts be glad you didn't get a huge voltage one lol. And the restriction of stun guns varries by state, in Texas they aren't even considered a weapon by law (had a criminal attorney look it over before I bought it) Tasers are the ones that need a licence because of the fact that they have a projectile, and if anyone is going to get a pepper spray like device go to and Army Navy Store and get police strength mace (much more potent).