Sextoys and Intimacy: Today, I found three of my sister's dildos as I helped her unpack...

By sisterlylove - 10/01/2015 19:02 - United States - Hannibal

Today, I found three of my sister's dildos as I helped her unpack boxes for her new house. Jokingly, I said, "Why would you even need three?!" She actually explained. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 388

You deserved it 13 904

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Sharing is caring

By Anonymous - 06/04/2022 00:01

Today, I found out my younger sister is too cheap to buy her own sex toys, so she has been borrowing mine. I clean mine thoroughly after use but apparently she just puts them back in the box after she’s done, while they’re still wet. Not gonna lie, I threw up a little after she'd admitted it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 197

You deserved it 206

Sharing is caring

By Can't Unsee - 25/08/2018 22:00

Today, my mother found my sex toys. To make me "feel better" she showed me hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 161

You deserved it 564

By tawnaciousd - 10/09/2009 06:35 - United States

Today, my sister surprised me by cleaning my room and doing my laundry. She found my journal, condoms and vibrator and decided to share her findings with my family. Oh yes... she also shrunk half my wardrobe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 145

You deserved it 5 052

How very dare you?

By Anonymous - 14/05/2019 06:00

Today, I came home from work and found my sister using my vibrator in my own bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 821

You deserved it 233

By Anonymous - 17/06/2015 14:12 - United States - Kill Devil Hills

Today, my wife came back from her camping trip with her friends. I decided to help her out by unpacking her stuff while she used the bathroom. It's funny; I never knew that a dildo, a ball gag and an open pack of condoms were considered camping gear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 140

You deserved it 3 104

By Person - 07/06/2009 18:07 - United States

Today, my mother found condoms in my room. She asked why and I said, "Just in case." She started laughing hysterically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 629

You deserved it 9 937

By quadropheniac - 09/06/2009 16:18 - United States

Today, I walked into the bathroom and found my sister cleaning her vibrator. With my toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128 484

You deserved it 8 103

By haha247 - 14/08/2009 14:09 - United States

Today, I was helping my brother clean his room. While putting clothes away, I found a box of thongs. They were mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 296

You deserved it 3 927

By Anonymous - 22/06/2016 00:28

Today, after the last few months of my sister living with me while she finds her feet, I asked if she could help me out by doing the washing up. Half an hour later, I walked into knee high dish soap foam in the kitchen. My sister was right in the middle, trying to sculpt dicks. She's 20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 102

You deserved it 1 093

By swtkiss1 - 18/02/2009 22:26 - United States

Today, my mom cleaned up my room. I had a drawer filled with condoms, 2 vibrators, and a bondage kit. She organized the condoms and vibrators in a shoe box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 912

You deserved it 58 623

Bricktothehead 21

Sunday 11 January 2015 0:02

You definitely walked into that one.

Eliseopwns 22

Sunday 11 January 2015 0:00

Ignorance is bliss, my friend.

Comments

Namenlos_fml 20

Sunday 11 January 2015 21:51

Ask a question you don't want an answer to, be ready for an answer you don't want to hear.

myusername23 17

Sunday 11 January 2015 22:24

Well, it's like this, she has three holes that need to be filled and she wants them filled all at once.

chanelleyy 26

Sunday 11 January 2015 23:08

at first I thought it said "my three year old sister's ******" :o

Lars93 18

Monday 12 January 2015 1:34

ass, pussy and mouth I asume ?

bgon1350 4

Monday 12 January 2015 3:29

because she likes to be airtight.

natorade12 3

Monday 12 January 2015 3:59

Oh.

Star01052 6

Monday 12 January 2015 4:04

Oh comon! The clit, ****** and asshole

Chevyguy_s10 10

Monday 12 January 2015 6:54

And what's the answer?

MartiOan 8

Monday 12 January 2015 9:59

I hope you learned something. If you´re not busy you can also share it with us

at0micmin3r 23

Monday 12 January 2015 13:32

'Tis what thee deserve get for not minding thine own engagements.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Weird Shopping My ex Awkward Relatable Racism Family Kids Love AITA Cheating Work Break-ups Cats Cute Animals Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Coworkers Alcohol Mental health Psychology Health Neighbours Cops Parents Scary Stressed out

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 698

You deserved it 9 549

Today, I'd planned a DIY 'treat yourself' spa day at home. I put on a face mask and settled to relax in a bubble bath. Just as I was getting out of the tub, I slipped on the wet floor and crashed into the wall, leaving a perfect imprint of the face mask on the tiles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 559

You deserved it 113

The Top

Today, in my film class, we were watching Schindler's List. At least, we tried. The moron next to me kept interrupting the most intense scenes with a very loud, "I don't get it." Not only did she break the focus of the class, but we had to keep stopping the movie to explain it to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 923

You deserved it 1 918

Today, I decided to start jogging and exercising, so I had a wonderful workout before work. Then I broke my foot at work. Goodbye exercising. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 140

You deserved it 2 526

Today, I bought a brand new huge leather recliner. After laying down and watching football for some time, I sit up and hear a loud shatter. My iPhone was crushed by the mechanics of the chair after it slipped out of my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 951

You deserved it 8 492

Today, my morning sickness decided to show itself every time I smell coffee. I work at a coffee shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 078

You deserved it 2 626

Today, despite driving extremely slowly and cautiously, we slid off the road due to ice and snow. The car hit a rock and the airbags deployed. We were in my 3-month-old car because the engine in my husband's truck blew last week. Merry Christmas to us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 737

You deserved it 820

Today, my boyfriend went in to kiss me. He came in too aggressively and passionately and his front tooth knocked against mine. I am now missing a third of my right front tooth. Average cost for a dental crown? $900. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 682

You deserved it 3 002

Same thing different taste

Sharing is caring

Sharing is caring

How very dare you?

Top comments

Comments