Today, I found out why my boyfriend wouldn't answer his phone last night. He was hanging out with our mutual friend all night. She had been texting me all night about what great sex she was having. My boyfriend was the only person there besides her brother. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I found out that when I text my boyfriend, he isn't the one to read them. Instead, he pays his friend to "keep the bitch busy." FML
Today, I spent the night with my guy, who I hadn't seen in ages. In the middle of sex, he answered his phone, told me to be quiet, talked to the girl on the other end about how boring his day was, then left the room to finish talking to her. When he came back, he asked if I felt like swallowing. FML
Today, I found out why my boyfriend won't come over anymore. He and my brother apparently had a "thing" before we started dating. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over and dropped off my phone, which I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts, I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. FML
Today, while making love to my boyfriend, my sister called my cell phone. Not wanting to face the consequences of not answering, I had a long conversation with her. My boyfriend kept going. FML
Today, my boyfriend forgot to tell me about the all-night bender he went out on, and what he got up to with my best friend. But its okay; the Facebook pictures say it all. FML
Today, to get my mind off being single, I texted some friends. The first one was going out tonight to work things out with her ex, the second told me about his amazing new girlfriend, and the third replied an hour later with, "Sorry, I was having sex when you texted me." FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend and one of his friends have been having sex with each other. His excuse? "She's my best friend, we do this all the time." I have been dating him for over a year. FML
Today, I found out that the reason my boyfriend hasn't texted me recently is that he'd forgotten he was dating anyone. FML
Today, I found a note in my boyfriend's phone titled "People's I've had sex with". There are also dates next to the notes which represented the day he had sex with them. Not only that it was NOT me who is the last person on the list, but I also realized that the last person on the list was my best friend. And he's a guy. FML
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Top comments
taycandy96 2
*****!!!!
trebla3193 0
Eww a threesome with her brother that's just nasty.
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Comments (154)
Jen_J_the_J 0
@ RushFanatic, my app of fml is so messed up right now i cant see my comment, i cant get to other pages and comments are coming and going :P thanks 4 pointin that out tho lol ;)
whiskers946 2
*****.
bonnieandclyde44 0
hbcfjbcds
bonnieandclyde44 0
****
BadLuckTuck 0
Ew, why would she tell you that she slept with her brother?!
fiicere 5
uhh, really tempted to call fake. How would you know there was only your BF and her brother there? She told you? So, she was kind enough to text you that she was sleeping with your BF??? Dunno about you, but if I was sleeping with my friend's GF, I would never text him about it.
hess1 0
your right
NyCzFiNesT 0
smack that b*****!!!!
SettoFail 9
Time to brake a skanks neck. Or atleast kick the living shit out of her, that's what I'd do.
jollykilla704 0
double whammy!
perdix 31
Your friend was lying. She was just mad that decided to have gay sex together and refused her repeated requests for DP or to be Eiffel Towered. I hope that makes you feel better.
CleanSheets 0
Pft, made me feel better...
sterl13 0
have I told you I love you?