Today, I found out what it feels like to get hit in the head with a bat. Not the wooden kind though. The one that bites and claws you when it gets stuck in your hair. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I now know how it feels to have a splinter of wood hammered a full inch underneath your fingernail. FML
Today, I found out what sound a hammer makes when it strikes the back of my hand. FML
Today, I thought I had a stick stuck in my hair. A very pokey stick. That aggressively bit my face when I tried to get it out of my hair. It was a big ass spider. My face feels like it's been punched. FML
Today, I got hit so hard in the head by a dodgeball that a contact popped right out. To make matters worse, I continued to get hit as a futilely searched for it. FML
Today, I learned that my hairdo must look like a rat. I found out when a hawk swooped down and dug its claws into my head while I was sunbathing. FML
Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML
Today, I found out what getting slapped in the face with lettuce feels like. FML
Today, I was shaving my underarms, when I heard a noise. I quickly turned my head to see what it was and got the razor caught in my hair. I'm now sporting a very attractive bald patch. FML
Today, I found out how painful it is when your ceiling fan falls on you. FML
Today, a baseball bat fell on my head while my boyfriend and I were cuddling. The same baseball bat that he keeps next to the bed, because he genuinely fears a zombie outbreak. FML
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Top comments
kay2810 9
Sometimes I wonder what lead to these kind of FML's...
crushedone 7
I see you've met my ex-girlfriend.
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Comments (142)
ladyLALAA 29
73, OP is from the United States, tell me if I'm wrong but pretty sure that's America...
Quiet_one 22
If you haven't already, you need to get yourself to a doctor for post-exposure rabies vaccines. Most human cases of rabies in the US are from bat bites, and the last time I looked it up the number of people who have survived rabies after showing symptoms was still in the single digits. Best not to risk it.
sarahrocrocrocks 5
i dnt get it
HerosBane 2
Actually most bats have pretty good eyesight; the smaller ones, however, do use echolocation to help them hunt and avoid obstacles. I agree with some of the other people, you should really go to the doctor and get checked out for rabies immediately.
bizarre_ftw 22
Puns & maiming
bizarre_ftw 22
Stupid FML deleted 1/2 my comment!! What it was supposed to read: Puns & maiming
bizarre_ftw 22
****!!! I tried editing that 3 times before the time ran out!!! I'm done. Add an arrow and the words "humor gold" in, I'm gonna go kick some bunnies >.< ......
bizarre_ftw 22
So rabies shot it is then?
nick6521 0
This has happened to me too. The bat was on the backside of a shed door and I poked it with a stick. It then did two or so laps around my house and landed on my head. WTF.
ValkyrieCain 0
Why the **** would you poke it with a stick???
brittany1655 5
i think i need an explaination..
brittany1655 5
i think i need an explaination..
Ibanez3x 5
I'd much rather be hit by that kinda bat...