Today, I found out that I have testicular cancer for the second time in two years, and they may end up removing my last testicle. Knowing full well I was also born with an extra rib, the doctor at the consultation joked, "Hey, you'll be three quarters of the way to being a woman." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I finally lost some weight. Unfortunately, that's only because I had a testicle removed due to cancer. FML
Today, on top of learning that I have three discs pressing on my spinal column and a labral tear, I also found out my left testicle dropped, but not my right one. I'm nearly 40 and I need to see a urologist over this. After the surgeries to fix my spine and hip. FML
Today, I went to the doctor thinking I had breast cancer. Turns out, I have a third boob. FML
Today, after my brother punched me in the balls a few weeks ago, and while I was clutching myself in pain I actually felt a hard lump on the right testicle, I got the results: it’s cancer but survivable if they remove the testicle. I had to thank my brother for saving me by punching me in the balls. FML
Today, my doctor informed me that the pea-sized bump under my arm is a "third breast." That's not what I meant every time I said I wanted more tits. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's because I could feel something solid in my breasts, and I wanted to get it checked, just to be safe. Turns out it was my ribs. Oops. FML
Today, I found out I have to have an operation. This will be the third in 3 years, all for completely unrelated reasons. I'm only 26 and apparently my body is already falling apart at the seams. FML
Today, after being diagnosed with breast cancer, enduring months of tortuous chemo, having painful radiation treatments and having had my tubes tied, I realized I’ve become the butt of an incredibly cruel cosmic joke. I got pregnant from the one-night stand I had to celebrate beating cancer. FML
Today, I was told I'll need a hysterectomy. I'm barely 22. My doctor said "You probably wanted kids, huh? That's gonna be rough!" FML
Today, I awoke with a swollen, painful testicle. I called the ambulance and went to the hospital. After they'd done an ultrasound, it's a bad infection. My nurse was someone I used to know and had a major crush on. She's responsible for checking my testicle every 20 minutes when she checks my heart rate. FML
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Top comments
IntoTheClouds 42
Sorry to hear about your cancer, OP. Best wishes.
josebeto1 6
****** up bro, hope you don't lose it
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Comments (289)
1482Genome 3
****** up about the cancer. Men and women have the same number of ribs. Your doctor is a moron.
skyeblue82 5
that's tacky as hell! I'd report that doctor! I am sorry about your cancer. I hope everything works out for you.
xblitzx34 0
What a dick....
m0hami01 2
If your doctor doesn't know that women and men have the same number of ribs, you should probably get a second opinion before he removes your ********.
Rock_Starr96 2
...Anthony?
jessicakathleen3 2
What a dick.
SadinSherman 16
Maybe you can go online and find a doctor rating website and give the doctor low marks
ptd02882 2
I call fake. Any doctor, no matter how far removed from routine musculoskeletal care knows that men and women have the same number of ribs. Additionally, I find it hard to believe stories in which professionals (who have not otherwise been described as mentally unstable or intoxicated) act so callous. The OP probably just heard a bad joke from a non-doctor and retold it on here in order to make it seem more tragic.
Jenipher2001 5
Why do people click "You deserved it"???? I'm sorry, I agree with a lot who said, sue and report the doctor. xoxo
yankfan89 27
That doctor has the best bed side manner