Today, I found out that getting drunk and attempting to take a dump out of a second-story window is a very bad idea. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Your brain on alcohol
Today, I found out that getting drunk and attempting to shit out the second story window is a very bad idea. FML
There goes the neighborhood…
Today, my drunk neighbor couldn’t get into his apartment and thought it would be a good idea to poop in our yard. He left a pile of diarrhea under our window, and poop-stained napkins all over the lawn. FML
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, I was woken up by a noise coming from the bathroom. Upon investigation, I discovered my very drunk, giggling girlfriend attempting to urinate standing up. Carefully note the word "attempting". FML
Today, I was unfortunate enough to discover what happens when you vomit mid-drink at a water fountain. FML
Today, I was taking a dump and I pushed so hard that I got light headed and passed out on the floor. FML
Put the booze down
Today, I shat myself in front of my girlfriend's family, after drinking too much the previous night and waking up with major stomach problems. FML
Today, after a few beers, I was exiting the bathroom of a loud house party when the door jammed. I had to climb out through the shower window. It was fool proof until my foot got stuck. I hung outside the house upside down in the dark yelling for an hour before someone figured out where I was. FML
One hell of a hangover
Today, my friend dared me to break a liquor bottle on my head. I slammed it into my head so hard I got dizzy, then did it a SECOND time and knocked myself out so hard that I pissed and shat myself. My head hurts really badly. FML
Today, I opened my window due to the good weather. I was lucky enough to listen to the sounds of someone violently throwing up for over an hour. The window got stuck open. FML
Top comments
LaColombianita 26
You're just full of shitty ideas aren't you, OP?
LookOnBrightSide 12
Guessing that isn't the best idea in the world, OP. Next time, stick with regular toilets, especially when drunk.
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Comments (111)
zingline89 18
Duh. Fourth story or higher or it don't count.
DrMime 10
Psshh, try an airplane! I call it pigeoning.
nic7973 23
love it!
le_troll 0
LOL
DrMime 10
Why was this a bad idea? The broken arse, or the shit smears On the broken arse? If it's a good time your looking for, try moxy! The only out of production soda that'll keep you on your toes!!! Did I mention I'm legally retarded?
flockz 20
please, amateur. you have to be at least 8and a half stories up to achieve maximum splatter radius. next time leave it to the pros.
eminemop 0
I have much to learn.
benmec 18
Hey when you gotta poop, you gotta poop. But peeing? Now that's just outta the question!
TheJashinist 8
I kinda guessed that would be a bad idea...
sugaryspice 5
That shouldn't fall into the category of something you have to "find out." Whatever the consequences, you totally deserved them!
lizard399 0
Since when do you drink and get good ideas? And why would you put yourself in such an uncomfortable position to shit? I mean come on now.. You can't try and be a Jackass, you aren't even getting paid so there's no real motivation for your stupidity, besides stupidity..
lizard399 0
Bah dun da dun.
jafreen 8
woah u can write names in block letters thn! ydi
AKholic47 0
I'd laugh if someone was under you