Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't go to work, she's actually been seeing another guy purely for sex, and each time he gives her money to "support her unemployment." Pretty sure that means I'm dating a prostitute. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that my girlfriend chooses extra shifts at work over hanging out with me. Every time. She doesn't even like her job. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been paying her half of the rent by taking my ATM card and getting money from my account. FML
Today, I found out that the man who offered to put up the woman I love in exchange for me helping out with his rent, has in fact been her "other" boyfriend since before she moved in. FML
Today, my fiancée decided to leave me because she wasn't happy. Little did I know, she's been fucking her coworker for the past month or so. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been cheating on me with two different guys. Her incredibly moving excuse was that she was getting "more experience" so she could please me better. FML
Today, I found out my girlfriend, who absolutely would never cheat on me because she’s been cheated on in the past and knows how much it hurts, has not one but two boyfriends on the side, who know about each other and do occasional threesomes. Lying bitch. FML
Today, I found out that my "girlfriend" is only with me for free transportation. She even has my contact saved as the car emoji. FML
Today, I found out that not only is my girlfriend already married, but she and her husband were planning some wacky scheme to steal all of my money, and run away to strike again in a new location, with new names. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend cheated on me with his boss so he could get a promotion and "provide" for us. This from the guy who made me quit my job because he said he made enough money to support us both. FML
Today, I learned that the girl I've been seeing for 6 months is actually married. She just dates me when her husband is pissing her off. FML
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Top comments
Ikickmidgets 11
Go get tested before your dick falls off man!
LucianDeSouza 4
At least you know you don't have to support her unemployment .
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Comments (236)
livewire1701 8
Time to get an STD test and a new girlfriend
GraceKathryn97 0
Awe sorry man that really has to suck!
speshlk37 13
Gator's bitches better be usin' jimmies!
OakenPrettyboy 5
Hahahaha made my day man!!!
p71interceptor 6
Gator needs his gat bitch haha
xSynergY 8
By the words you chose, it sounds like your still with her. Make sure she gives you a cut!
grapes1414 0
Pimp lol
jennyc246 8
all I could think of at the first part was friends with benifits.
Ikickmidgets 11
have your bottom bitch take her out, pimp
ikickgingers 15
...
ikickgingers 15
If I see somebody with the name ikickgingermidgets, I might have to swoon.
False_Stupidity 42
#108 I might have to create such an alter ego then, just to see you swoon.. But there can be only one kicky
mojojojo91 6
As stated above, you could make a profit from her and find yourself a better girlfriend who actually respects you and herself.
xSynergY 8
I don't think that "a better girlfriend" would appreciate a guy who's profiting off his previous ***** ex lol!
mojojojo91 6
Well obviously, I was just saying that for the sake of joke. Seriously OP, there's need to waste your time with her because she apparently thinks you're not worth hers.
Aedus 6
Correction: you WERE dating a prostitute.
rattusrattus 19
I think 'low class courtesan' might be better, prostitutes tend to have a wider client base...
milky0candy 0
Blame it on the economy
aardvarkish 17
Blame Bush!