By Anonymous - 03/06/2010 12:23 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my boyfriend keeps a gun under his pillow. This was only after my friends and I surprised him with his birthday cake while he was sleeping. FML
I agree, your life sucks 35 459
You deserved it 7 052

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Stefany713 0

be careful...don't cheat on him lol

how could you *not* know he keeps a gun under his pillow?


Stefany713 0

be careful...don't cheat on him lol

So did you die? Hes just tryna keep safe. if hed actually shot someone with a real gun i dont think youd be posting it on here so be thankful.

missmurderx 8

exactly. don't cheat, lmao. that tends to equal a made for tv movie. :PP

well. if the cake had a stripper in it like it should have he might not have brought his gun out

Yeah... Cheating would be bad... My ex-boyfriend has guns in his closet, a hatchet in his bedframe, a knife under his pillow, and always carries a knife with him, so it doesn't seem to that big of a deal to me... :/

littlemissdqgirl 8

I wouldn't go around suprizing that guy....

hmm op do you live in Texas? Because it's not uncommon here to keep guns under beds and such. Under a pillow is a bit extreme, but still, it sounds like good ol' Texas :)

^ I wasn't aware there's a United Kingdom in Texas...

oh haha I just saw that other comment...I guess it's legal there too

missmurderx 8

32; it says the op lives in the uk, but they asked if they lived in Texas. he was making a funny(:

I'm afraid to shoot a pistol. the weird thing is is that I hunt with a 7mm 08.

missmurderx 8

you look like a very happy human being, 36. #sarcasm.

op is from uk... so saying he's from Texas is dum

jade567 0

36 looks like an awesome person! jeez.

Blue_Coconuts 7

14, your ex boyfriend is way too paranoid... What does he think, the Mob's got a hit out on him? Either that, or he is trying way too hard to look "cool".... I'm not sure which is worse, but most likely he's an idiot with them, and that's the fast lane for getting someone hurt or killed by mistake. I used to sleep with a gun under my pillow, but I realized that it's better to be safe. I keep it close by, so I can get it if I need, it's in a case that requires a finger tip scan, so there's an extra step. I'm also a light sleeper though, so if a door opens anywhere I can wake up... Meh.

lucious_mama 0

you hunt? wow I wouldn't have guessed you as a hunter... except for maybe makeup and bad music

This is very unlikely be true, guns are pretty much totally illegal over here.

wait, isn't it like illegal to own a gun in England?

Stefany713 0

i own this FML cause I was first! muahahaha! now y'all have to obey me!!

MrJangles 0

52 yea that "finger tip scanner" is going to be a great idea when you need it quick. I keep mine in a drawer by the bed. I keep my rocket launcher in the finger tip scanner in my secret bat cave under your moms bed

the guy I'm talking has 2 guns by his bed lol they freaked mr out. He hid the first one for me, but the giant one just chills in the corner...kinda scurry... :-/ haha

talking TO, and it freaked ME out* gahhh lol

Under the pillow seems stupid why not under the mattress?

xshadyshadow 0

90- Youre really pretty. haha, how's THAT for off topic.

sharmen 0

I shot my lover in the head, didn't kill him but he's almost dead

Sean, your cat could feed Sudan for 3 days

52: I respect the fact that you have served in the military, and that you are telling everyone in gun-related FML's to (and how to) use them safely. Also, I agree that some people do not know how to use firearms, but there are others who DO know how to use them, so such sweeping generalizations are unnecessary. Besides OP's boyfriend might know how to use his pistol.

Blue_Coconuts 7

100, I wasn't talking to OP, I was talking about 14's ex boyfriend, who has weapons stashed all over his room like he's getting attacked all the time. That's a text book case of being paranoid, and those people should be limited in their weapons. I don't think sleeping with a gun under the pillow is all that bad, the only reason I don't is because I take ambien and I can get loopy, it's a safety thing. And again, I can get to my pistol in 10 seconds, which is far faster than someone can get into my front door and into my room (both locked at night)... Anyone who broke into my house would be a fool. (82.... I also have young kids in my house.

Tadeusz_fml 5

EVERYONE: This IS a serious FML because it IS ilegal to own a firearm in Britain. Hence the far lower murder rate.

rosemary1990 0

lol dont get on his bad side. Bang !!!!

106 Haha I suppose that makes more sense... although with some of the FML's lately, 14 could be lying or completely serious. Either way, if the mob is after him, I should hope he knows how to operate his nomerous weapons. And 103 were you talking to me or 106? If you were talking to me, how did you know my name.... O.o

*14'z ex souls be able to use his weapons *numerous (teh grammar Nazis)

damn not again.... I was never a good proofreader *should

Blue_Coconuts 7

Yeah possibly, then it's more understandable. But it's far fetched to think that's the case... And I guess we have the same name, because she was talking to me.

Story, I know you're jealous of him.

wow be careful or he might hole a gun to ya face

As1LayDying 4

perfectly normal. everyone does that right? Ha!

also wdf this is in the uk aswel? guns are illegal .:. ur bf is dodgy

Blue_Coconuts, actually, he's not paranoid. He just likes weapons. Hahaha. But he's also really safe with them. He's the only person I know that I would trust with knives and guns. So, I dunno. I gueess he and I are both messed up. :)

Also, Blue_Coconuts, he doesn't have as many guns and knives as I seem to have implied. He has the 1gun under his pillow, and a couple of other guns. Then several knives and the hatchet. Sorry if I misled you to think he has, like, 10 of each. :/

118, I know you can never fully believe me b/c this is the internet, but I swear on my life that I'm fully serious. And he DEFINITELY knows how to use them all! He won't keep a weapon if he doesn't know how to use it amazingly.

you don't get it. in Texas u can have guns easily

161, that is not a toy gun, right? USP, nice choice. 

158 - lmao YES!!!!! Hahaha that was perfect! Pillow vs. gun. Live: tonight at 2 am. Who will win? lol 160 - Thank you for that comment!! Normally I agree with things Blue says, but the "paranoid" statment kinda irritated me since he doesn't know my ex. Not a ton, but kinda. :)

glorialaura21 8

Katy wht is wronge with you girl! are you like on a farm or in a gang o somthing! pshhh I live in texas! I dnt carry a gun !

lol that's illegal in UK.. must be gangsta innit blud?

crazyj12006 3

That'll show you… LoL Good thing he didn't shoot

Badass, (not really). Butterfly knives are more awesome though.

how could you *not* know he keeps a gun under his pillow?

how is this a political debate. there are democrats that have guns. I did not know that the second amendment only covers republicans.

The OP is from the U.K. anyway. They don't have the 2nd amendment. That's why it's not unusual to break into people's houses there, with or without cake.

If you live n Britain and have a gun you get arrested and sentenced to at least 1 year so this FML is VERY fake

Maybe he's a cop or a hard core drug smuggler/dealer. I'm sure that just cuz it's illegal doesn't mean people don't do it, no matter how perfect you British think you are.

There're not all illegal. you can get licenses for shotguns over here.

SeedlessMe 13

Ok well if this guy has a Shotgun under his pillow, that just makes it way worse!

Tadeusz_fml 5

Yes, but it's really only farmers etc. who can apply for shotgun licences. You need a good reason.

How do you not know that? Do you even sleep in the same bed??

FYLDeep 25

you dont have to live in the ghetto to have a gun under your pillow. extra protection

l3allin_all_day 0

chea thas how we roll in da hood

"Hey, you are not my boyfriend!" "Oops, wrong house"