Today, I followed my neighbor's advice and sprayed Sprite on my Christmas tree because it will "make it live longer." I just came downstairs to find my Christmas tree covered in ants. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, while trying to take my Christmas tree down, I learned that at some point during the last few weeks, it became home to a colony of green ants. I'm now covered in bites and terrified to go anywhere near it. FML
Today, my family and I went Christmas tree shopping. My husband and I were walking around when I saw the perfect tree. Excited, we immediately bought it. When we got home and set it up, I realized it came with a present: termites. FML
Today, we brought our Christmas tree inside to decorate. We decorated it, then went out to dinner as a family. Returning 2 hours later, we came back to find our living room to be occupied. Not with people. The tree had been filled with baby spiders, and they were all over the living room. FML
Today, I bought a Christmas tree and carried it up three flights of stairs alone. I finally got it inside, only to realize it was too tall. I tried trimming it, but now it’s crooked, shedding everywhere, and leaning like it gave up on life. I hope the greenish marks on the ceiling won't be permanent. FML
Today, I finally discovered the reason my front room smelt funny. My dog, thinking the Christmas tree was real, has been peeing on it for the past two weeks. FML
Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML
Today, I woke up and found that the tree in my front yard was gone. FML
Today, I was visiting my childhood home, and I checked out my old treehouse. A family of skunks had made it their home, and I was promptly sprayed upon entering. FML
Today, to try to have a less depressing Christmas, I've put up a small tree in my apartment and wrapped some presents for myself. I woke from a nap to the sound of my cat vomiting. What did she throw up on? The presents. FML
Today, for the first time ever, my family bought a real Christmas tree instead of using our old fake one. Today, I also found out I'm allergic to Christmas trees. My family won't get rid of it because they paid so much for it and intend to "get their money's worth". FML
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Top comments
SuperPizzaMan_fml 11
Kill them ants with diabetes
Cainicide 5
Spray sugar on it - I heard that kills ants.
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Comments (76)
laurenlovesjb 20
How did you not see that coming?
sweetstuffFML 1
How have you survived on a website like this, with a picture like that?
DogsPaw 16
Because of your profile pic.
wrmatt88 4
You're actually a dumbass for believing them and doing that...
pradip 26
Spray some DTT powder and if anyone asks tell it's virtual snow effect.
spaboolly 26
I was always told to put aspirin in the water at the tree base. Don't know how that really helps, but it certainly sounds better than spraying a plant with sticky, sugary, chemically modified soda.
SillyGirl4602 23
A customer at the bar I work at told me to use aspirin and hot water. I have never heard of doing that before.
SApprentice 34
15- That's what my parents always did. I'm not sure if it actually helped, but it didn't seem to hurt anything. They didn't use hot water or anything though, they would just drop some aspirin in the water at the base.
kofeinisti 6
Aspirin contains a mild acid which kills bacteria. Less bacteria, happier and longer-living plants.
TacoBelle 8
Slightly acidic water travels up the stems to the flowers faster than neutral or basic water and keep the flowers hydrated and fresh longer. In addition to water, plants need sugar for food. Since they're cut off from their roots and are unable to get food, putting them in Sprite or 7-up would be a good idea.
Shadow_Phantom 26
Sprite isn't good for humans, let alone plants. The hell, man? YDI.
Sally2dicks21 8
Why?
MatteKudasai 17
Because OP's neighbour told them to!
buckdharma 38
Next time use Mountain Dew, which your tree will love. This won't attract anything but the teenage gamer ants who won't drink any unless you take it to them.
lmbachman 23
Ahahaha... Awesome.
HiTenshi16 11
You should of watched the Mythbusters Christmas special.
MatteKudasai 17
Should have* Say, did an FML of yours get published earlier today?
thecrapblog 8
I love Mythbusters it's so funny! And you are right cause' they checked that...
martin_martian7 11
Use coca cola next time. Bees love that! (Yes I know there aren't no bees on winter) lol
Tummystix 4
Uhm.... what?
goldfox 1
Aren't no bees... So then there has been some bees? You see, grammar is very important to the nazi party.
goldfox 1
*have
Dancer_143 4
Aren't any* you can't use a double negative.
Enslaved 38
Well, I've heard that half Sprite/ half water, and a drop of beach helps keep "flowers" blooming longer. Maybe the the neighbor meant for you to water the Christmas tree at the bottom, not spray the whole thing?
tr1sha 7
I completely agree with you! Some people can't follow directions; even if you write them out, describe them, and draw a picture.
LaLince 40
I agree. And it works even better with 7up. This time YDI