Health: Today, I fell asleep at a party. I farted so loud that I woke...

By embarassed - 21/04/2011 03:24 - United States

Today, I fell asleep at a party. I farted so loud that I woke myself up. Everyone heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 339

You deserved it 12 936

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/08/2009 04:06 - United States

Today, I was at the beach with friends and I fell asleep while I was tanning. When I woke up, everyone was laughing hysterically. I asked what was so funny, and one of my friends replies, "you farted so loud in your sleep that you woke yourself up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 548

You deserved it 7 943

By pootie - 11/12/2013 13:14 - United States - Miami

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 576

You deserved it 7 560

By kingkobrastrikes - 21/01/2015 01:56 - United States

Today, I was asleep and snored so loud that I woke myself up. I was at work and I am now the laughing stock of the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 516

You deserved it 20 530

By Anonymous - 26/01/2019 11:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, in my sleep I let out a couple of farts. Normally this wouldn't be a big deal, but on this night I had slept in my mom's room. She came to check in on me and violently woke me up because she thought I pooped in the bed. Now my entire family knows I fart in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 116

You deserved it 384

By Wowsers. - 30/01/2010 08:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 801

You deserved it 35 997

Drunk hookup ends with a… bang

By Anonymous - 14/10/2019 12:00

Today, I woke myself up by farting in my sleep, only to realize that the guy I'd brought home from the bar was still next to me. He was awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 472

You deserved it 549

By Anonymous - 24/11/2009 05:57 - United States

Today, like many other days, I fell asleep in math class. Unlike other days, however, I woke up with a start while ripping a really loud fart in my sleep. The whole class heard it because it was during a lecture. Even the teacher was laughing at me and I had to walk, no, run out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 668

You deserved it 29 288

Single shot

By irulan - 14/01/2020 03:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I farted so loudly in bed and I woke up my husband. Startled, he thought that someone was entered in our room and fired a shot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 535

You deserved it 596

Threat Neutralized

By Anonymous - 23/07/2018 18:36 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, I farted so loudly in my sleep that it woke myself, my husband, and our cat. The cat let me know he was startled by clawing and biting the perceived threat, my bum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 308

You deserved it 730

By The horror... - 11/11/2015 16:52 - United Kingdom - Luton

Today, I farted myself awake, in a car full of my boyfriend's family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 370

You deserved it 3 171

FriskyTaco 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:46

that's why I always wear my buttplug when I go out...YDI for not wearing your buttplug

ceddyz17 10

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:51

aww party pooper ")

Comments

misskbeth18 4

Thursday 21 April 2011 19:00

Eww.. Thats So Grosss !

gearsmaster 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 19:23

ew and your a girl? girls dont fart only guys. you HERMAPHRODITE! :x

OHnathanIO 4

Saturday 23 April 2011 8:07

Gears 3 = WIN

Knottegirl 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 20:20

Been there, done that

buttercup_mcm 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 22:08

lol that is so embarrassing

trappedinthevoid 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 22:12

Pft, stick with it and yell "top THAT!"

Sniper_Fidelis 1

Thursday 21 April 2011 22:31

If everyone heard your fart and you were able to wake up, it must've been a lame ass party.

hxc4god 0

Friday 22 April 2011 3:06

lmfao! that's so awesome u don't even know!

kourtney12302 0

Friday 22 April 2011 3:43

LMAOO!!!!

wasabiinurvagina 0

Friday 22 April 2011 4:47

Too much bean dip?

6joe9 0

Friday 22 April 2011 7:30

i heard it 2 you discusting bit**

Keywords

Animals Cute Hair OCD Love Tattoos Sex AITA Health Relatable Mental health Work Relationship advice Nepotism Management Clumsy Accident Miscellaneous Family Awkward Periods Embarrassing Airport Vacation Food Gross Cats Zoom Parents My ex

The Top

Today, I arranged a romantic dinner for my boyfriend. His favourite meal, fresh flowers, scented candles. Everything went beautifully, at least until he wrapped an arm around me and whispered, "Want some dick?" into my ear. Mood horrifically ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 875

You deserved it 7 381

Today, I realized that I'm jealous of my newly-divorced roommate. She has so much freedom now because her daughter lives 50/50 with her ex. I'm trying so hard keeping my household, relationship, work, and kids happy, and I'm tired and overwhelmed all of the time, while she goes on vacation with her new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 170

You deserved it 324

The Top

Today, my mom told me that she heard me and my best friend in my room grunting and talking about how hard we were. She said she loved me and accepted me no matter what. Thanks mom, but we were working out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 220

You deserved it 5 751

Today, my new boyfriend and I really wanted to have sex, but he went soft as soon as he entered me. This happens every time we try. I feel cursed by my year-long dry spell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 860

You deserved it 4 536

Today, I'm going to a cocktail event, except my dress is wrinkled and can't be ironed, so I got my steam cleaner from storage. I saw what looked like mold inside the water container. Turns out a mouse had got into it, drowned and started to decompose. My apartment now smells like death and my dress is still wrinkled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 423

You deserved it 236

Today, my thoughts are filled with fantasies of pleasuring my boss under his desk, to the point where it distracts me from job duties. I take a break and wank at work, and then I return to my normal way of thinking and how much I love my wife and how happy I am. Lust really can blind someone to what is important. FML

I agree, your life sucks 181

You deserved it 454

Today, I talked to my crush for half an hour. It wasn't until I was home that I realised I had some remains of the sausage roll I ate an hour earlier spread all over my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 825

You deserved it 8 434

Today, my son said his first word, which was, "Fuck". He got it from my great aunt, who my wife was skeptical of our son meeting because she "says too many bad words". Sorry, Honey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 515

You deserved it 2 756

Same thing different taste

Drunk hookup ends with a… bang

Single shot

Threat Neutralized

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