By Anonymous - 23/7/2018 18:36 - United States - Fort Worth

Threat Neutralized

Today, I farted so loudly in my sleep that it woke myself, my husband, and our cat. The cat let me know he was startled by clawing and biting the perceived threat, my bum. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3183

You deserved it

677

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Top comments

By beeferjay | 34

#7665391 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 2:38

They say cats protect from evil spirits... Maybe you let out some demons without knowing it

By BurnInDemonFire | 30

#7665367 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 1:50

What a cat-astrophe.

Comments

By BurnInDemonFire | 30

#7665367 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 1:50

What a cat-astrophe.

thelittlem | 15

#7665475 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 9:26

cat-ass-trophe

BurnInDemonFire | 30

#7665555 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 13:56

No, that crosses into extreme Dad joke territory, and I'm nowhere near close to being a dad, so I kept the pun simple.

By beeferjay | 34

#7665391 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 2:38

They say cats protect from evil spirits... Maybe you let out some demons without knowing it

John Nemeth | 14

#7665406 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 3:31

And thus the term
“Fart like an Egyptian was born!”

By Glowworm56 | 25

#7665395 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 3:02

Curiosity may have killed the cat but he'll be damned if your fart kills him!

By RichardPencil | 27

#7665405 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 3:26

It’s amazing that cats instinctively go for the blowhole!

By Donut_Wizard | 23

#7665411 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 4:16

Sounds like the premise of a half-assed country song.

By Abbusser | 9

#7665416 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 4:48

Did your husband then claw and bite your bum? You startled him too...

By acmariner99 | 23

#7665419 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 4:52

Cat: 1, Bum: 0

By Madrias | 36

#7665425 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 5:36

The cat was just trying to save you from having another fart attack.

By TCRII | 26

#7665539 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 13:30

Your cat knows that you should never trust a fart.

By Tarlachia | 33

#7665649 - Tuesday 24 July 2018 17:17

Since cats typically nocturnal, maybe he was trying to shut off the alarm with his eyes still closed?

Cat: “Fuck, fuck! Where is it?! So damn loud! Shut up!”