audreyav
Dallas, United States
Today, I discovered my cat's favorite hobby: sitting butthole-first on my favorite makeup brush. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
upliftmofo
Belgium
Today, I discovered my cat frequently licks my toothbrush. FML
hoo flung pu
United States
Today, my dog figured out she can wipe her butthole on my walls after having squeezed out a turd or two. FML
crazycatlady
Ashland, United States
Today, I woke up with my cat's asshole planted firmly on my forehead. FML
Anonymous
Reno, United States
Today, in the very middle of the night, my kitten started rubbing against my face. Thinking I saw her face in the darkness, I decided to kiss her before going back to bed. My lips made contact with her butthole. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I found out my roommate had mistaken my toothbrush for his dog's. So for the last month he's been using my toothbrush on his dog. The dog's favorite meal? Fresh cat poop. FML
Laura
Today, I caught my daughter attempting to stick pencils up our cat's butt. FML
GrossedOut
United States
Today, my roommate finally cleaned her cat's very full litter box. I later found our only good spatula crusted with kitty feces, which she'd left on the kitchen counter for me to find. FML
toothpastecat
Canada
Poor kitty
Today, I was brushing my teeth. As I bent down to spit my mouthful of toothpaste into the sink, my cat decided it would be a good time to stick his head right where I was spitting. I spat a huge glob of toothpaste on his head. He then shook it off all over me and the walls. FML
Pooped
United States
Time to go to the vet
Today, my cat is extremely sick and has trouble grooming himself. As evidenced by his butt. He laid on me for a while and it wasn't until a few minutes after he got off that I realized he had stained my pants. That also explains why my chair suddenly looks so nasty, and why my room smells horrible. FML
Jim20
Friedberg, Germany
Revenge is sweet
Today, I found out my sister scratches her butt with my toothbrush every time she is mad with me. FML
Top comments
notyobitch 0
Most things sit butthole first.
nslurve 4
I failed to think of a clever comment.
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Comments (139)
MIDMichele 5
Your cat is an asshole.
TheVelocirabbit 10
Pun intended?
MIDMichele 5
Didn't think that was needed. Kinda thought it was implied. Thanks for clarifying.
LittleDevil01 4
You'll be smearing more shit onto your face..
ndawgg 6
Is there some other way to sit?
pwnman 33
FML and cats... Why
zkern28 2
That's just nasty stuff right there!
MaryPoppins88 14
Pink eye!!
cupcake4eva 6
Your cat likes it soft and fluffy...
nyoomlio 0
Op l live in Oregon too and cats here are wierd! My cat does wierd things like that too.
LaughinStock 16
No but she just discovered the hobby, what if this cat has been doing it for a while now. :-/ CAT: "This bitch I wanted Meow Mix but she gets store brand, I'll teach her" >:|
ninjapiratejesus_fml 20
Most eye shadows and lipsticks are colored with ground-up beetles. Truthfully, almost anything that is artificially red is colored with beetles.