Animals: Today, I discovered a brown recluse spider in my house. Before...

By NotSpiderman - 31/10/2012 17:09 - United States - Edinburg

Today, I discovered a brown recluse spider in my house. Before I could smash it, it escaped under the door. Now I'm freaked out and wearing boots and gloves, clutching at my kittens and waiting for it to appear. My dad laughs everytime he walks past. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 689

You deserved it 4 617

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Same thing different taste

By jillydark6609 - 19/09/2010 06:21 - United States

Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 284

You deserved it 14 258

By yuckspider - 20/04/2009 00:17 - United States

Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 316

You deserved it 7 643

By terrified - 09/08/2015 03:10 - United States - Forest City

Today, I saw a huge wolf spider in my room. It ran off and hid before I could kill it, but after two hours looking for it then giving up, I finally found it, with my foot, as I put on my shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 406

You deserved it 2 444

Adapt, improvise, overcome

By Arthur B. - 24/09/2019 12:01

Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 347

You deserved it 456

By eyes wide SHIT - 28/12/2013 01:37 - Australia

Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 014

You deserved it 5 947

Hidden

By fml9124 - 20/09/2019 14:00

Today, I saw a scorpion crawling across the kitchen floor. While trying to swat it towards the middle of the floor to prevent it from escaping as I looked for something to kill it with, my cat came to investigate. Kitty thought I was playing with a new toy and joined in by batting the scorpion under the oven. I know it's plotting its revenge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 371

You deserved it 168

By AussieGirl - 21/11/2009 11:40 - Australia

Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 141

You deserved it 4 017

Juicy breakfast

By Anonymous - 07/01/2022 01:01 - Canada - Warman

Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 042

You deserved it 150

By MyNameIsNotJeff - 08/05/2015 03:23 - United States

Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 218

You deserved it 3 107

By Boyufd - 09/09/2018 03:30

Today, knowing that I have severe arachnophobia, my brother brought over his friend's tarantula. One hour later, the spider got loose. It's been 5 hours and I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 916

You deserved it 229

Hiimhaileypotter 52

Wednesday 31 October 2012 22:14

I don't blame you. Spiders are terrifying.

AGhost5445 25

Wednesday 31 October 2012 22:17

Your dad is a brave man.

Comments

cuban777 0

Friday 2 November 2012 3:33

Lol

raptorboy 1

Friday 2 November 2012 5:43

I got bit by one and it was brutallllll. I had to go to the E.R. One night and they had to preform a surgery on me

doby199 6

Friday 2 November 2012 6:24

Be careful I heard that they're poisonous

TomGouin 12

Friday 2 November 2012 22:22

There's a myth that says that at any given time you have three spiders at least two meters from you. Have fun sleeping!

RBenjamin24 0

Sunday 4 November 2012 0:29

PaulieXP 16

Sunday 4 November 2012 23:47

Look, he's crawling up my wall Black and hairy, very small Now he's up above my head Hanging by a little thread Boris the spider ...

bored_betty 1

Wednesday 28 August 2013 2:13

:D Only other person I've come across that knows the lyrics to Boris the Spider!

KuuipoSays 1

Tuesday 6 November 2012 8:30

It may not really be one. I was bitten by its cousin a hobo spider & learned a LOT about both. That are not as identifiable as most people think and MOST often people are wrong. Without finding it and taking it's NOT maimed carcass to a pro, you can't know.And, they are a 'recluse'. They don't wander. . Plus, spiders don't randomly bite people. You aren't food. It's when they are threatened like when trapped against you by clothing, etc. (how I was bitten). Shake out your clothes and relax. Also- they aren't interested in your bedding either. No food there.