Intimacy: Baked

Baked

By NotHappyJan - 03/12/2018 03:00

Today, I thought I'd take advantage of the lovely weather and sunbake topless in my grandmother's back yard. My grandma went up the street to do some shopping and didn’t tell me that men were coming to mow the lawn. I was laying on my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 755

You deserved it 2 002

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Same thing different taste

JBP fever dream

By Mike0410 - 24/06/2024 17:00 - Romania - Alba Iulia

Today, I went for a picnic by the river in the forest with my grandma. I forgot to bring a swimsuit, and wasn't wearing any underwear either, so she just made me go naked. I got caught fully naked by some dirt bikers when I went to find a spot to pee. My grandma just laughed, really hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 338

By Anonymous - 02/09/2009 17:38 - United States

Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 183

You deserved it 17 632

By fihifgni210 - 20/05/2009 16:54 - United States

Today, I decided to go tanning. I went outside and took my top off and laid out in the sun for about an hour. When I was about to go inside a phone rang. It belonged to one of the five men that were working on my roof and watching me the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 760

You deserved it 73 648

Tanning

By Anonymous - 13/07/2014 04:08 - United States

Today, I decided to tan naked in a secluded part of my yard, so I wouldn't get tan lines. I even felt adventurous enough to leave my bikini and towel inside. This idea backfired however when my mom stopped home from work, assumed I wasn't home, and locked all the doors before she left again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 679

You deserved it 15 760

The art, the artist

By waltzy777 - 26/04/2009 08:12 - United States

Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, I had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. Right when I'd finished, I ran out of gas. My 83 year-old grandmother saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 612

You deserved it 83 051

By kha - 24/03/2009 10:18 - United States

Today, I decided to surprise-visit my grandparents. After knocking on the door and not getting a response, I opened it and walked in. Upon entering their house and yelling, "Hello", as I turned the corner I saw my near-deaf grandmother folding clothes while watching TV. She was topless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 304

You deserved it 15 151

By mediocreboobs - 18/02/2009 22:31 - United States

Today, I was home alone tanning in my backyard which is fairly secluded. I took my top off and laid there for awhile before I looked over and saw the UPS guy standing at my gate with a package because nobody answered the door. I looked horrified and he said not to worry, he'd seen better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 460

You deserved it 8 892

By Anonymous - 09/07/2013 16:07 - United States - Katy

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 742

You deserved it 23 092

By PeepShow - 06/08/2009 06:04 - United States

Today, it was just too hot. I stripped down and, being home alone, pranced around nude, lip synching and playing air guitar to some music. I was getting really into when I opened my eyes and looked out the window to see an old man with binoculars on his terrace. He wasn't birdwatching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 276

You deserved it 47 094

By bees - 09/10/2014 06:51 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I was mowing my grandma's lawn when I was suddenly swarmed by bees. When my grandma saw me covered in stings later on, she said, "Oh yeah, there are tons of bees in the grass! Be careful!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 067

You deserved it 2 711

BurnInDemonFire 34

Tuesday 27 November 2018 17:29

Did they offer to trim your bush, too?

RichardPencil 30

Monday 3 December 2018 3:27

Pay no attention to the crazy lady above. Feel free to sunbathe topless anywhere!

Comments

sunnyray812 42

Monday 26 November 2018 22:28

Lesson here? Never sunbathe naked unless you're at a nudist beach.

BurnInDemonFire 34

Tuesday 27 November 2018 17:27

Is that experience talking? Asking for a friend.

RichardPencil 30

Monday 3 December 2018 3:27

Pay no attention to the crazy lady above. Feel free to sunbathe topless anywhere!

PenguinPal3017 19

Monday 3 December 2018 4:45

Does it really matter whether yard workers see her or beach goers? I assume she just didn't want to be seen, hence doing it when grandma was out.

TheSminty1 17

Monday 3 December 2018 20:18

LOL, because nobody can see you there

BurnInDemonFire 34

Tuesday 27 November 2018 17:29

Did they offer to trim your bush, too?

Phillycheeze 20

Monday 3 December 2018 3:19

You are my new hero...... lol

Stan_The_Man 7

Wednesday 5 December 2018 4:08

Nice

wanted_2_want 40

Monday 3 December 2018 6:02

I’m sure that was hard for them to see the view.

TumblrweedPasses 11

Monday 3 December 2018 14:23

It was so hot you were sunbaking?? Jesus

BetterThanU 1

Monday 3 December 2018 20:16

Don't lie, you wanted the D. YDI

TheSminty1 17

Monday 3 December 2018 20:17

Nothappyjan meet Happyjuan

GUYMAINE 16

Tuesday 4 December 2018 8:46

At your gmas? really?

Stan_The_Man 7

Wednesday 5 December 2018 4:09

Some would say that it’s nice to feel appreciated every now and then.

Krystal.xo 12

Sunday 10 February 2019 6:05

but did you continue?

lovelytrish1990 11

Sunday 28 April 2019 12:35

Well that’s embarrassing 😳

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Management Poopoo peepee Work Awkward Coworkers Relatable Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Dogs Animals ADHD Transportation Love Dating Health Anxiety Technology Mental health Sleep Roommate Clumsy Noise Confused AITA Parents

The Top

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 635

You deserved it 42 712

Today, my dad is freaking out because he thinks he's next on the list of targets the NYC CEO shooter has. Not because he himself is a healthcare-ruining CEO, but he's a pharmacist who gets death threats every week from patients he can't give medication to, due to insurance companies denying everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 482

You deserved it 73

The Top

Today, I found out my parents only had me in an attempt to fix their relationship. It didn't work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 077

You deserved it 1 389

Today, I noticed my kitten was growling and twitching in his sleep. I tried to wake him up by gently prodding him. He responded by waking up and attacking my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 778

You deserved it 31 288

Today, after volleyball practice, I noticed my pants were missing. Now I have to go to work wearing spandex bottoms, all because one of my teammates is a thieving douche. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 407

You deserved it 2 205

Today, my boyfriend convinced me to go crazy and get a short haircut, then dye it all pink. When we got home he wanted sex, and he'd bought me a military uniform to wear, which is when I realised he was trying to turn me into one of his anime girls FML

I agree, your life sucks 476

You deserved it 283

Today, my girlfriend asked for me to come to her. Then move my head in close to her and close my eyes. Expecting a sweet and romantic kiss I positioned my lips for my surprise. My surprise wasn't a kiss, instead it was a nice crunchy booger she placed in my mouth with her finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 021

You deserved it 5 885

Today, at my first day of my dream job, I dropped a delicate $700 piece of machinery on the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 826

You deserved it 443

Baked

Same thing different taste

JBP fever dream

Tanning

The art, the artist

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