Today, I came home from work and had to pee so badly that I ran to the bathroom and ripped my pants down. My touch screen phone dropped from my pocket and started calling my boyfriend. Since I couldn't quite reach the phone, I left a message of me peeing on his cell. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I texted my crush that I can't come over and invited him over instead. I was so anxious for his reply I took my cell to the washroom with me. Just as I was pulling up my pants I heard something fall into the bowl, I turned around and watched my cell floating in the my own pee, vibrating. FML
Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML
Today, I was locked out of my house and had to pee. I waited an hour for my boyfriend to come home. When I saw him pull into the driveway, I peed myself in excitement. FML
Today, I accidentally dropped my phone in the toilet. I automatically dove my hand in and ran out of the stall with it. As I dried it, some girls were laughing. I assumed that they were laughing because my phone fell in the toilet. Then I noticed my pants were still down. FML
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I got the strong urge to pee right as I got home from work. In my hurry to get inside, I grabbed my keys out of my pocket. They flew out of my hand, into the bushes. I couldn't find them in time and ended up wetting myself in my driveway, three minutes before I had to pick my daughter up from school. FML
Today, I woke up desperately needing to pee. I sat up in bed, naked, and tried to decide if I should get dressed, or run for it and hope no one saw me. I guess I took too long to decide, because as soon as I stood up to run, I pissed on the floor. FML
Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML
Today, I got into my boyfriend's car having to pee really badly. I accidentally peed everywhere. He kicked me out. I had to walk four miles home in 20 degree weather. In wet clothes. FML
Today, I was at work and I needed to pee. In my haste, I forgot to lock the door. A coworker walked in on me and I bolted up mid-stream to slam the door back shut. I had pee down my leg and pee squishing in my shoes for the rest of the day. I can still remember his tone of voice, yelling, "Sorry"! FML
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Top comments
peanutbutterfly 0
WOOOOOW... just claim it accidentally called him when you were doing the dishes
Phoenix_GAD 0
fail. lol i have a touch screen too. it calls random people.
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Comments (160)
SublatePandemic 0
Um... look on the bright side. At least it wasn't very noisy diarrhea, right? Now that would have been bad.
SamSJester 0
You peed on his cell phone! That is quite uncalled for... (no pun intended)
King_of_Kings 3
not an FML if all of you reading this are interested in seeing Things That Deserve To Be Destroyed, follow this link - http://www.youtube.com/PlyWoodProductions
quietgirl 0
to all the people who think she peed ON his phone, you guys are dumb asses
highonlife77 0
Get an iphone 3g s and that wont happen
spillproof 0
haha this is funny. You don't deserve it, but your bf should find it a bit funny.
lolwhat_fml 0
that must be so annoying lol
realworldready 0
He probably laughed his ass off. Not such a bad deal, frankly.
coldplaylive2003 0
At least you weren't crapping
Caayouteepie 0
If you ever are leaving a message on someones phone, you can just push 1 and it will let you listen to your message and even rerecord. btwwww! (: sorry about that tho.