Today, I came home from the army and explained to my family how tough it was there. Then, as I was walking away, I stubbed my toe on the couch, fell and cried. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, as I got up from the couch, my computer, which was next to me, fell on to my pinky toe. It fell just so that the edge of it cut my toe open. I cursed, and hobbled toward the bathroom to get a bandage. As I'm going into the bathroom, I stub said toe on the door jamb. FML
Today, I woke up really out of it, and as I was walking into the kitchen, I stubbed my toe on a tile. I sat down, then got up and stubbed the same toe against the table, went over to the kitchen and stubbed the same toe on the same tile again. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs and landed heavily on my foot. Because I wasn't crying, my mom refused to take me to the hospital. It took me an hour of agony to convince her. It turned out to be broken in three different places. FML
Today, I went to shut the door and ended up banging my toe on my guitar stand; then, as I was getting a snack out of a closet, I banged my toe again on the drawer and now I can't walk. FML
Today, I tried to sneak into the kitchen for a midnight snack. I stubbed my toe so hard on a stool leg, I yelped then tried to keep as quiet as possible. My mom came running, thinking our cat and dog were fighting and hissing again. I hobbled back to bed, only to realize I didn't actually get any food. FML
Today, my girlfriend, her grandma, and I were leaving her house to eat lunch. I stubbed my toe on the door while exiting. It hurt, so I stood there shortly in pain. I heard my girlfriend's grandma call me a "pansy". I later saw blood and took off my shoe. My whole toenail had come off of my big toe. FML
Today, the neighbors heard a blood curdling scream and called the cops, thinking I was being murdered. Nope. I just stubbed my toe. FML
Today, I hit my toe against a table. Out of frustration, I kicked the table and broke my little toe. FML
Today, I was home alone in my apartment. I tripped over my dresser and fell and sprained my ankle. As I was laying there in agonizing pain, my downstairs neighbor shouted at me to shut up. FML
Today, since my family and friends always make fun of me for being a wuss when it comes to pain, when I stubbed my toe, I made a point to not scream or complain in any way. Instead, I vomited and fainted. FML
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Top comments
FML_Elle 17
Stubbing your toe can really hurt! And thank you for your service
That_Ginger 18
Just be thankful you didn't step on a lego block. Many a good men have lost their lives to those foul pieces of plastic.
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Comments (168)
montreh 2
Don't worry. Stubbing a toe is like taking a dagger to the heart. Be lucky you didn't step on a lego!
cbcs222 13
No matter what toe, no matter how old, stubbing your toe brings a grown man to his knees!
SuperStormCindy 8
way to sound arrogant.
MadLife136 3
Situational irony at it's best xD
tbro47 23
I stubbed my toe on the corner of a stool once and it pushed the toenail on my pinky toe in until it was no longer held on by anything so yea stubbed toe = fyl op
Blink_me26 21
To be fair, that really ******* hurts.
wellyouknow 9
I totally understand. I'm Navy and I still think few things hurt worse than stubbing your toe...
blackonblight 33
I think it was less the toe stubbing and more the emotional state, the embarrassment of how you tempted fate, and the freedom to react that way because you're with family, that combined to make a tearbender out of you.
inumiko 12
okay, stubbing your toe pretty much on anything hurts like a B****!! if you wouldn't have reacted like us normal human then I'd say you lost pain receptors out there on the battlefield. Respect! thanks for your service
Likian5 26
Is this the same guy whose parent's laughed at him when he said he wanted to join the army?