By Anonymous - 14/05/2018 05:00

Today, I went to a guy's dorm for the first time. He told me to wait outside for a minute because he had to "clean something up" first. When I told him I'm 420 friendly, he said, "Nah I just came on my desk earlier and didn't feel like wiping it up." FML
I agree, your life sucks 4 781
You deserved it 694

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And then is when you tell him that you remembered you had to get up early next morning and leave

Now you know never to contact him again. Who knows what diseases he is riddled with if he is such a slob. And even if he isn't, I would not want to have anything to do with him. He probably shits and pisses all around the toilette and can't bother to clean after himself. Ugh, it makes me shudder to imagine personal hygiene (or more likely - lack of it) of such a person.

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Now you know never to contact him again. Who knows what diseases he is riddled with if he is such a slob. And even if he isn't, I would not want to have anything to do with him. He probably shits and pisses all around the toilette and can't bother to clean after himself. Ugh, it makes me shudder to imagine personal hygiene (or more likely - lack of it) of such a person.

kev1029 22

That's a little much

At least he cleans for you

And then is when you tell him that you remembered you had to get up early next morning and leave

ChristianH39 30

Should've just let him go clean and walked away as soon as he went inside

There's something really wrong with a guy who not only does that, but tells someone.

I know it's considered weird but wearing a condom to masturbate really does prevent making a mess. Tissues work but they aren't full proof and require a hand which complicates things especially if using your phone. Just wear a glove even for self love.

Sounds kind of expensive.

Toilet paper works so much better than tissues. Wrap it around your hand and twist the end closed and you have a perfectly shaped spooge catcher.

sohigh10 34

Toilet paper disintegrates, so paper towels are more practical because they're more absorbent

Put a sock on it....

You need to alert the faculty that they need to put on hazmat gear to handle his homework. No worries about the exams, though -- evidently he has a good grip on his testes.

Lobby_Bee 17

Bring a black light, it'll light up his room like a Christmas tree!

did he have unlawful carnal knowledge of office furniture?

Could be good boyfriend material, that is, if you’re ok with a guy who cheats on you with furniture. No one’s perfekt.