Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. Then I found another note on a can that said, "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML
Today, I went into my fridge and someone had drank all the beer. Only my 8-year-old son lives with me. FML
Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML
Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML
Today, I was packing my son's lunch and we'd ran out of water bottles. I asked my 16 year-old to run to the store. She didn't want to, but gave me one she had. After dropping my son off, my daughter frantically told me she'd made a mistake. I sent my second grader to school with a bottle of vodka. FML
Today, my dad taped a picture of me to the fridge with "Do not feed the she-beast" written on it. FML
Today, I'm taking care of my 12-year-old daughter because my ex-wife thought she could cure our daughter's lactose intolerance by sneaking milk into her soy breakfast. The milk had expired. FML
Today, someone drank a sip of my single serve pasteurized orange juice and put it back in the fridge, ignoring the whole jug of non-pasteurized juice, that I cant drink because im pregnant. I cried. FML
Today, my parents finally realized that I've been sneaking vodka when they weren't home. Note to self: don't let them freeze vodka that's actually 75% water. FML
Today, my 11-year-old cousin walked up to me as I was enjoying a glass of wine with friends at my mother's birthday party. Thinking she wouldn't like it anyway, I let her try. The little fucker drank the entire glass in one go, adding, "Usually, daddy gives me vodka." Good to know what my family is up to. FML
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Top comments
WowLifeDoesSuck 0
Wow, kids are getting smarter.
mastercrammer 0
You should feel lucky to have a smart daughter who really cares about you.
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Comments (862)
amirn86 0
#21 - that's not true... I don't know where you live but 7 year olds can definitely spell and some of them I've come across read more and more challenging material than the average adult on a regular basis lol remember that show "Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader?" - 5th grade is roughly 10, so it's 3 years earlier but MOST of the people on that show weren't smarter than a 5th grader so a 2nd grader should be right at their level lol That said, this is a WISE little girl, and I am very impressed. Alcohol will drown you (and her) slowly, you best be quittin that
noclevername 0
I didn't assume from reading the OP's post that they were an alcoholic. Your kid doesn't necessarily know how much is bad to drink, so she worries that you drink at all. It's sweet that she worries, and a cute story, certainly not FYL. If you do have a problem, you still have a daughter who is concerned for you and wants to do what she can to help, instead of being scared of or angry at you, or just resenting you. Still not FYL.
mrcarmine 0
you've got one hell of a daughter, man. be thankful for getting such a smart/clever/funny one.
Akala_fml 11
That's awesome XD
unibrowicorn 0
I just want to say, s/he didn't say that he drank the beer(or whatever) after s/he found the second note. Maybe the person DID listen to his daughter...you guys don't know.
TheGuyNextDoor 0
What are you doing just drinking around the house in front of your daughter?
ayoooooo 0
wow, so clever. aww. :]
jonlon15 0
Please, if your 7 year old daughter had to point this out to you, PLEASE seek help.
alumfoil 0
Quit being selfish and making your 7 year old daughter worry.
Bunny420 0
Ye if he has a drinking problem he should try quit, but maybe his daughter heard the dangers and assumed its all dangerous... If i were you i'd talk to your daughter about it, and try keep the drinking to a minimum.