Kids: Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink...

By Anonymous - 21/03/2009 04:46 - United States

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. Then I found another note on a can that said, "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 600

You deserved it 688 952

Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Nick - 13/08/2009 19:47 - United States

Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 407

You deserved it 147 187

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 22:00

Today, I went into my fridge and someone had drank all the beer. Only my 8-year-old son lives with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 632

You deserved it 388

Irony failure

By alcoholic - 31/10/2009 14:30 - Estonia

Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 826

You deserved it 51 739

Can't stop, won't stop

By Matt8 - 07/12/2012 01:07 - United States

Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 458

You deserved it 2 119

About to Popov

By badmom - 27/03/2009 18:42 - United States

Today, I was packing my son's lunch and we'd ran out of water bottles. I asked my 16 year-old to run to the store. She didn't want to, but gave me one she had. After dropping my son off, my daughter frantically told me she'd made a mistake. I sent my second grader to school with a bottle of vodka. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90 357

You deserved it 17 984

By jgdgjyfg - 25/07/2011 07:21 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad taped a picture of me to the fridge with "Do not feed the she-beast" written on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 196

You deserved it 8 912

By reasonablysingle - 11/06/2016 03:27 - Australia - Greystanes

Today, I'm taking care of my 12-year-old daughter because my ex-wife thought she could cure our daughter's lactose intolerance by sneaking milk into her soy breakfast. The milk had expired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 389

You deserved it 1 267

Hormonal hell

By Anonymous - 05/08/2020 23:02

Today, someone drank a sip of my single serve pasteurized orange juice and put it back in the fridge, ignoring the whole jug of non-pasteurized juice, that I cant drink because im pregnant. I cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 507

You deserved it 277

By ccat209 - 20/12/2016 04:05 - United States - Riverton

Today, my parents finally realized that I've been sneaking vodka when they weren't home. Note to self: don't let them freeze vodka that's actually 75% water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 680

You deserved it 9 069

Family values

By Anonymous - 06/10/2019 12:00 - Croatia

Today, my 11-year-old cousin walked up to me as I was enjoying a glass of wine with friends at my mother's birthday party. Thinking she wouldn't like it anyway, I let her try. The little fucker drank the entire glass in one go, adding, "Usually, daddy gives me vodka." Good to know what my family is up to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 733

You deserved it 642

WowLifeDoesSuck 0

Saturday 21 March 2009 16:01

Wow, kids are getting smarter.

mastercrammer 0

Saturday 21 March 2009 16:05

You should feel lucky to have a smart daughter who really cares about you.

Comments

leggomyeggo 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 20:16

your daughter is clever. well at least she cares about you/your health.

Tihihi1 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 20:46

haha, your daughters cool! and funny!! and smart!! cool cucumbers man, cool cucumbers... listen to her, alcohol is bad, even in small doses

gardengnome2 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 21:28

you've completely ****** up your child if she's upset enough to do that you're a douche

Komatose 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 21:47

Dude, they prolly just starting that D.A.R.E. program at her school. You kno, the one where they pretty much tell kids that drinking is the devil? She proly doesn't even know what she's talking about. And the OP could just be a functioning alcoholic. Anyway, good luck with your situation.

f_r_E_a_K 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 22:18

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. what a cute kid. GET OFF THE ALCOHOL!

firstnlast77 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 22:20

YIKES out witted by a 7 year old...maybe you should stop and think that she was right? 'cause apperently drinking is not helping it's kinda mean that she's not only has to ask you to stop drinking cause's she's scared FOR you but also that you did (if not were going to) anyway

Android18 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 22:59

Listen to her.

chmollen 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 23:24

How the hell is this a FML? Its more like **** you.

m0053 0

Monday 23 March 2009 0:02

how is this an FML? if your 7-year old knows there is a problem, how the hell do you not know?

Leilaaa_fml 0

Monday 23 March 2009 1:18

#5- you are a piece of sh*t... & I hope you listened to your daughter. Just cause you want to f*ck your life, doesn't mean you should f*ck up her's too..