Today, I bought Plan B for the first time. Not because I had unprotected sex, but to make the cashier think someone would actually sleep with me. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I once again bought condoms at the gas station to make the people who work there think that I have a sex life. FML
Today, I nervously went to the store to buy condoms for the first time. I felt like everything was going well, and checked out happily. As I was walking out, the cashier lady said to the woman next in line, "He thinks he's going to need condoms." They both looked at me and started laughing. FML
Today, I went to the local pharmacy to buy some condoms. When I went to go purchase them, the elderly lady behind the counter took one look at me and said, "Honey, you're your own birth control." FML
Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy the Plan B pill. The pharmacist recognized me and said, "Really? Again?" FML
Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML
Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML
Today, I went to the health department to get on some birth control. I left the health department without birth control, and with the news that I'm pregnant. FML
Today, I bought a Plan B at CVS. I always use my parents' phone number for reward points. Turns out my mom is enrolled in digital receipts. FML
Today, I wore a fake wedding ring on my left hand when buying a pregnancy test so the cashier at Walmart wouldn't think I'm a slut. FML
Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
idkweird 0
Why the hell would the person at the pharmacy counter care whether or not you're having sex? Pathetic.
succubusprime 0
YDI for wasting $50 on someone who will forget about you seconds after leaving the store.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (146)
younggunz 0
she's gonna forget you in a second.... ydi
baby_val 0
ouch
JameeBilthuis 0
fake. who would do that and waste the money. you must really be a ******* loser wow
cbb5j 1
that's just idiotic...
yellow_snow 0
first off **** u for doing that. I had to go to 2 diffrent stores looking for plan b one time because they were out and seeing this makes me wonder if some dumb ass did the same thing as u. I wish I could slap the shit out of u.
AnRom 0
FAKE!!! no one is that stupid or desperate.
muffinmanyahurd 0
your life is a fistfull of fail. no one wants to **** you, because you do stupid shit like that. you could have used that money to buy a vibrator for your lonely ass.
Galanothwolf 0
You wanted to prove to the cashier (who you don't know) that you were too ******* stupid to know what you were doing and need to kill your unborn child? The cashier won't care about you because you're not the only person who buys Plan B and you don't exactly think "oh wow, she needs to kill her unborn child, she must get around a lot" if anything he'd think you're a *****. Were you trying to get lucky with the cashier? That's a hella bad pickup move "hey, I need to kill my child so there's space for yours", or something like that. It wouldn't work so you basically just blew money to convince a random person that you're not completely disgusting, repulsive and that there still might be hope for fertilisation with you. Dumb ass.
SPN_lover666 27
How cute, a male thinks he is smarter than women. Hey moron, Plan B won't work if you're already pregnant. It is a stronger dose of the birth control pill. Now sit down and shut the **** up since you're just showing the world that you're too ******* stupid to know the difference between the abortion pill and Plan B
rosierosierosie 0
I'm curious about who actually said "FYL" lol
lorrainepaola 0
then you must be ugly ....