Today, I asked my boyfriend if I've gained weight. He replied, "Why do you think I've been so often on top lately?" FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I noticed that I've been gaining some weight. Don't worry, my boyfriend doesn't mind. His new favorite thing is putting my boobs on his head and saying he feels "safe". FML
Today, I was getting out of the shower, when my boyfriend decided to ask, "Did your boobs get smaller, or did you just gain weight around them?" FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend to honestly tell me if I had become overweight. He replied that yes, I had, but that it was OK because I was his "Lumpy Space Princess." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I gained a few pounds and thought I looked fat. He replied that I looked the same and that I shouldn't worry because he likes fat girls. I never thought I was fat before this. FML
Today, feeling confident, I asked my boyfriend what he thought of my new body, since I had lost 16 kilos over the past month. He told me that he missed the old me and wanted me to gain weight again. My boyfriend was the one that encouraged me to lose weight in the first place. FML
Today, my boyfriend encouragingly told me that he could tell I was losing weight, all because I had one roll fewer than usual on my stomach. FML
Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML
Today, my boyfriend of four years told me that I appeared to have gained some weight. After realizing that it made me feel depressed, he tried to make me feel better by making love to me. I decided to go with it. While doing so, he paused and said, "I'm sorry baby, but your weight is too much pressure for my back." FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend about how I'm self conscious about my weight. He looks at me and says, "Don't worry babe, I've always been kind of a chubby chaser." FML
Today, I was doubting my boyfriend's feelings for me, so I asked him if he found me attractive. He replied, "Well, you're thin enough…" That's all. FML
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Top comments
irokyoursox 6
Why do you need to ask someone of you've gained weight you can just step on a scale
Meme1988 18
Well, its less "work" for you :)
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Comments (149)
s0m3guy2010 21
Why does your boyfriend have to have strange sentence structure? That'd bother me more than someone gaining a little weight.
BrownEyes97 1
I'm glad I'm not the only one that got that.
TonyIsMyDog 2
Grammar has gotten worse and worse since computers became popular.
thericcanator 4
I was thinking the exact same thing!!
s0m3guy2010 21
The FML has been changed to sound more normal. I probably sound crazy now, but that's ok. I can be the one FML conspiracy theorist that claims to have been abducted by the FML team on more than one occasion. Of course... it's not a conspiracy theory if it's true.
s0m3guy2010 21
But the government told me that the FML said "so often on top" instead of.... nevermind. Just please don't assassinate me.
FalconCrunch 4
Sit on his face and ask him again.
awagh666 14
He won't talk with his mouth full.
OriginalimoaN 15
He might tongue the alphabet though. ;P
dancersinger124 7
Haha, yes.
Perksofbeingawal 0
I'm usually on the bottom. :) it just feels way more comfortable. Lol jk, never been laid.
ladyLALAA 29
Hahaha
IndigoAcrylic 9
xD
Enslaved 38
Why do girls ask these type of questions? There is never any "correct" answer that you can't twist to make the guy seem like an insensitive prick. You know you gained weight, hit the gym for you own health and stop putting your guy on the spot, for **** sake!!!
BikeAllDay818 6
Omfg thank you 18! ****, I hate that girls do that, it's so annoying.
Isoldael 27
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Because it's really funny to watch your guy struggle to come up with a politically correct answer :p. I ask my bf these things sometimes (jokingly), he knows exactly what I'm doing and sees it as a challenge. Then we both have a good laugh about it.
Isoldael 27
Just for the record, I think no one should ask such questions when serious, seeing that my previous comment is being thumbed down.
tottdancer 0
Maybe u should try and say u no it doesn't matter I love u any way u look
niniloka 2
good one 87 he should have done that!!!
awagh666 14
Said it like a boss.
hellonyancat 6
He could have been a bit more sensitive in his reply but at least he's honest. And hey, it hasn't stopped him wanting to have sex with you!
Rasetsu 10
And yet I bet he's heavier than you. So HE should be on the bottom.
xeldawyn 14
23- my boyfriend is 6'6" and weighs around 220lbs. I'm barely five foot and 110lb. He is almost always on top ;) So I'm pretty sure weight has little to do with it
TonyIsMyDog 2
Two things - most men are heavier than women and the post was referring to the girl's weight so yes, weight has everything to do with it - neither of your posts make any sense.
downtime 13
You realise when the guy is on top he isnt usually straddling the girl, right? A bit of a difference there...
MerkathonPro 0
Damn. Well, more cushin' for the pushin'.
erockinthesuburb 17
If you ask a loaded question like that, the boyfriend is doomed to sleep on the couch no matter what his response is. You got an answer, whether that was the one you were looking for or not.
keepingitnasty 15
Op, are you really complaining about your bf? He's still ******* you right? Don't push the guy away, just hit the gym, drop some LBs.
Hamcons 1
Hell yeah!