Today, I arrived home to find my cat dead and note saying, "Sorry, I tripped over him." Not only is my cat dead, but I was robbed by a polite thief. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, I got robbed. I just moved so I didn't have much in my new house. They did decide that my cat was valuable enough to steal. FML
Very smart
Today, I woke up to find out my house was robbed. He didn't steal anything of value, but he stole my beer, dog, and cat. FML
Today, my house was robbed while I was at work. The robber left a note telling me my stuff was crappy and that they found my safe under the bed. FML
Today, I found my cat dead on the road. I called my family and told them, and later buried the cat. Not long after I got done burying it, my cat walked up to me. I buried someone else's cat. FML
How could you?
Today, despite me not liking cats, which my wife knew, she got a cat anyway. Her cat went for a walk outside and was hit by a car. I rushed outside to help the cat but found she was already dead, and the culprit had driven away. When my wife found out that her cat was dead, she thought I'd killed her. FML
Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML
Today, my cat died. But, before he could bite the dust, he left a goodbye present on my bed: a decapitated baby rabbit. FML
Today, I was robbed while recovering from a robbery. FML
Today, I came home from holiday, only to find my house full of small decomposing animals, courtesy of my cat. FML
Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML
Top comments
DocBastard 40
I'm moving to South Africa if this is how the criminals act. I'm tired of getting robbed by assholes who aren't even polite enough to apologize for stealing my shit.
smallsmerry 0
how does tripping over a cat kill it?
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Comments (149)
Mauskau 36
Fingerprints on the note! Go go go!!
ImaginaryFoe 1
Gloves on the hands! No, no, no!
NeverShoutKira 0
He might bees stupid, you never know, know, know!
youngclench 0
i guess we'll have to wait and see. On an unrelated note, I am Santa Ho Ho Ho
thedeepthinker 0
i roflcoptered and giggled like a giddy schoolgirl.
MustangGirL 0
Well, it couldve Bern a rude their. "The bitch is dead"..
newzealand 28
Give me those two 'r's, and I'll give you an 'e' and a 'f'. You might find an apostrophe useful too.
yumsugarr 8
hey. At least he/she was polite (:
samiboy9 0
rip cat
Teenagedream_fml 0
the note or pen will have his finger prints :)
LebronJames06 0
**** your cat!! (: lol
solefamous 0
lmao that is so strange. the way you typed it "I was robbed by a polite thief" was funny. I feel sad for your cat though, hope you feel better
staypon 0
sorry to hear bout the cat :/ the robber will diaf.
iDoWhatiWantTo 0
Awww D: