Today, during jury duty, the shitbag who's accused of capital murder in our trial took the stand. The prosecution made him look like a total idiot. He got more and more flustered and eventually screamed at us that he'll have us killed if we find him guilty. I believe him. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML
Today, I am defending a client on trial for perjury. She is a sweet girl and the first person I've loved in years, but she keeps doing everything she can to make herself look guilty in front of the jury. Now I'm having a daily crisis of conscience in the middle of the courtroom. FML
Today, I just about managed to convince the judge to overlook my client's emotional outbursts in the courtroom, promising that he'd be on his best behavior from now on. An hour later, he screamed "FUCK YOU!" at the judge for telling him to quiet down. I hate my job. FML
Today, as a public defender, my client was actually innocent for once. I intended to utterly destroy the prosecution's case and demonstrate his good character. That plan went straight to hell when he showed up heavily intoxicated. FML
Today, I was in traffic court trying to get out of a ticket. The judge called my defense "complete, unadulterated bullshit." FML
Today, in court, my client ran his mouth at the judge, cursing him out and then trying to lecture him on "freedom of speech" when he was found in contempt. I don't know what it is with these nutjobs, but I wish I'd never become a public defender. FML
Today, I read a book by a former client who did time for fraud. She swears she's innocent, and blames everyone for her "ordeal": the police, court, judge, and me, her own attorney. She conveniently forgot to mention her two full confessions, one of which was given before the judge. FML
Today, I had to help pick a jury for trial. I had to do a roll call to make sure that everyone was present. I stood up in front of a packed courtroom and said, “Okay, I’m going to do a roll call to make sure that everyone is here and pregnant.” FML
Today, my true crime addiction is so bad, when I read an FML about someone's dissociative personality disorder, I immediately thought they were lying and just preparing a good 'not guilty' defense because they planned to murder someone. FML
Today, I cannot believe my husband. All he had to do was contest a bogus parking ticket but because he's incapable of keeping his fat mouth shut, now he’s going to jail for contempt of court. He will lose his job because of this, guaranteed, and we have two kids to support. FML
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Top comments
AyeJay101 25
Was that enough to find himself guilty?
mkmon7 21
There must be a way for you to get off the case if you feel threatened...
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Comments (110)
veritoswty6 14
I can relate! I had a similar situation only that time I felt I was being followed twice and the criminal's lawyer asking us jurors if there was any way we could think again about finding him guilty.. I feel sorry for you. I felt my life was in danger.
hberri331 18
I come from a family of attorneys and judges. This shouldn't of been shared.
noonenoeone 22
It doesn't matter that it was, no one knows the current status of the case and it could be quite old.
hberri331 18
We don't know when the trail happened but the Op said that is was taking place now. FML should not have posted this.
Ilmoran 20
All FMLs are written as "today", and people have come back to comment that the FML they posted actually occurred years ago. There's a good chance that this isn't a current trial.
vikky538 29
It only happens in texas.
Miss_Whipped 43
I think you should **** off, is what happens in Texas.
laden_swallow09 35
And it's people like you who keep the system broken. Good, honest people who aren't afraid of doing the right thing are the kind of people we need serving on juries instead of mindless sheep who can be easily swayed.
Miss_Mandi 29
It's ok OP, he'll get what's coming when they bend him over and make him the main b*tch in prison.
tamesenicole 27
Pretty sure you can't talk about what goes on in jury duty. You'll get removed
reeper147 14
Dude you can not be out talking about the case in any way, even anonymously. You know you can face a felony for this, right? Moron. I can't believe the website would actively help you perform a felony
Mossygirl357 12
your not suppose talk about the case your on for jury duty.
heyLaddieHey 18
Do you realize you can get the case throw out of court for posting this? Hope no one on the case frequents FML
lizlafluv98 10
Aren't you supposed to tell no one