Today, at my new job at a funeral home, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't "lighten the hell up" while dealing with our grieving clients. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I got a heads-up that my boss suffered a death in the family, but was coming into work anyway. I thought he'd be depressed, but it seems he deals with grief with anger instead. I found that out when he yelled at me, threatening to rip my spine out my ass over a typo I made in a report. FML
Today, I was fired for being a very happy and perky employee. According to my boss, it freaks both the customers and my co-workers out. FML
Today, my boss told me to fire the unstable, former military, gun nut employee. He's been making death threats to his supervisors. FML
Today, my boss told me she had a nightmare where her life depended on me, and I let her die. Now I'm ridiculously paranoid that I'm going to get fired at any second. FML
Today, my spineless shitwhip of a boss made me go fire a notoriously abusive employee. I had to act like firing him was my decision, even though I'm the secretary. Now I get to live in constant fear that the guy was serious when he threatened to find out where I live and kill me. FML
Today, my boss wrote me up for appearing "depressing" to customers. I told her that I was upset because my dog had to be put down yesterday. She told me, "Aw that’s sad. But guess what? That dog ain’t gonna pay your bills and put bread on your table. So cut the emo crap or you’re fired." FML
Today, my boss fired me because of the way I laugh. Apparently it reminds him too much of his ex-wife's laugh. I'm a guy. FML
Today, my boss called me into his office. After yelling and firing me, his assistant comes in telling him he had mistaken me for someone else. He did not give me my job back, as he claimed it would make an awkward work environment. FML
Today, the manager that hired me and worked for years to inspire and connect her staff was laid to rest. Hours before the funeral, her replacement told me he wanted my two weeks notice on his desk tonight. I've been a model employee, he just doesn't like me. FML
Today, my boss fired me for causing a "commotion" at work while running the vacuum. FML
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Top comments
mirthfulMessiahs 21
Sounds like a dead-end job to me.
ironichalibut 24
They already have to see a dead person in a coffin, they shouldn't have to see one behind the counter too, or whatever your new job is.
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Comments (71)
perdix 29
Hey, they are already mourning the loss of a loved one -- they don't need to hear your rambling stories of you car's slipping clutch, your frigid cheating girlfriend and your myriad digestive tract disorders.
Durotic 8
Now you know why he works at a funeral home...good luck.
epicRawrz 16
At least he didn't say to make it more lively
perdix 29
Don't be such a stiff.
profoundkisses 18
Why you you light him up on fire :)
_DudeGuy_ 16
Op, you need to liven up! So do all the dead people.
theboy13 13
Come to work tomorrow as a joke wearing a bright colored smiley face shirt!!
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 22
Well show up tomorrow wearing a clown customs and start making tricks and telling jokes
wvcheesehead1 9
Yes, he wants you to put the fun back in funeral.
avapaige1234 19
How can one have fun when your relative just died? Some people should never have been a boss.