maybe?
Hamburg, Germany
Today, at a paintball match, my boyfriend shot me between the legs and asked, "Still want kids now?" FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
LagSwitchFTW
United Kingdom
Today, I played an intense paintball match, with me and my friends versus my boyfriend and his buddies. When we won, my boyfriend went mental and said he only lost because of "lag". When I pointed out we weren't in a video game, he reacted by firing a paintball straight into my chest. FML
Anonymous
Commack, United States
Today, I went paintballing with my girlfriend and her family. Her dad ended up shooting me, and I doubled over in pain. I thought that was it, until he stepped back and shot me several more times in the stomach. "Just double-tapping," he smirked. More like quadruple-tapping. FML
CatLady
San Francisco, United States
Today, I brought up the subject of marriage with my boyfriend. His response was to shoot me with a nerf gun and laugh. FML
iusedprotectionanyway
Waitakere, New Zealand
Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML
sore
Australia
Today, I was paintballing when I got shot in the stomach and winded. As I was gasping for breath on the ground, someone came up and shot me point blank in my crotch. FML
walllflower
Saint Catharines, Canada
Today, I went paintballing with my siblings. Once we were done, they realised I hadn't been shot at all. They cornered me in the forest and lit me up. I have welts all over my legs. FML
Anonymous
Ballshot
Today, I shot my boyfriend in the balls by mistake, twice. First it was a paintball gun I was using with my nephew, then it was a slingshot I use to scare away the bird who keeps eating fish from my pond. He is now sat icing his groin acting like I did it on purpose. FML
Z
Australia
Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML
Anonymous
Today, I went paint-balling with my girlfriend. As we drove she was scared about getting shot a lot, especially in the head. I reassured her that with all the protective gear it was unlikely. First round, within a minute, she gets shot 3 times in the back of the head. FML
AquaRevolver
New Zealand
Today, me and my girlfriend went paintballing. I made sure we were on the same team, so I could protect her and be manly. The first time she got shot was by me, I shot her finger. It broke. FML
Top comments
CreamGravy 36
I hope the answer is, "Yes, but with someone else"
Welshite 40
Unload your clip at his crotch. Fair is fair.
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Comments (107)
smithv171 17
While it's a bit out there, I'm sure he was just trying to be silly and didn't mean any harm. Just talk to him if it really upset you.
FMLtroll1234 7
#12 That's beyond stupid and extremely feminist, withholding sex isn't going to work its just going to get him annoyed. So before you go spouting your feminist views think about the long term effect.
tdawg91 17
He intentionally shot her in the ******...... How does he mean no harm???!!!!
smithv171 17
#26: Obviously I interpreted differently from you so don't get snappy. she said between the legs, so I read it as he missed because there was no indication that he truly hit her. I speak and read 3 languages so thing are not always interpreted how others may see.
Brandi_Faith 34
12, he intentionally hit her in the crotch intending to cause her pain, implying that it would be similar to giving childbirth. Yes, he was probably joking, but seeing as paintball shots can cause huge welts and even make people bleed, plus the fact that he was intending for it to be at least a bit painful, I'd say it was a big deal. I think he was being a huge jerk and she definitely needs to have a talk with him and reconsider the relationship if he does stupid, hurtful things like this on a regular basis, joking or not.
Retaheki 27
#54, I don't know how speak/read 3 different languages affects interpretation, but in most cultures I've seen, being hit or shot in between the legs means they got hit in the crotch.
smithv171 17
thanks for clearing up #68. #78: Oh really? Where does it say she was hit in the crotch? Oh yeah, it doesn't. I have trouble with inferring unless things are directly stated because since I know 3, I don't concentrate on one language. I also have a comprehensive disability. But thank you for your concern.
limabeans101029 21
54- I get that FMLs don't have much information in them and can often be interpreted differently, but this one wouldn't make a lot of sense if he hadn't actually hit her.
smithv171 17
Basically, I'm saying since i know 3 and maintain study is french, I don't catch hints. I read it as he shot by her not actually hit her so my mistake but I don't need people yelling, thank you to those who explained it. It was a misinterpretation. Does this make more sense now?
Brandi_Faith 34
No problem 93. There's always different opinions to each FML. I agree he was probably joking, but it was definitely not funny. Plus a lot of people don't realize how painful paintballing is and don't realize that getting hit usually hurts pretty bad.
smithv171 17
I agree completely that is painful and not funny and i know from paintball myself. But I misread it and everyone attacked instead of seeing confusion I had.
devildog562 33
I'm sure he'll be sad when you tell him he never makes you that sore or wet.
MGS428 8
Respond, "Still want sex? I guess not. "
Y0UI34574RD 15
If they're a gay male couple I feel like there could be much more meaning implied here.
rocker_chick23 27
OP is a woman
Bebbo_fml 21
This is when you unload all your ammo in the same area op. After recovering of course.
Le_ponderer 14
Pfffft! A paint-ball is the best he could think of? That's nothing to compare to birthing a baby. He should think more cannonball.
tdawg91 17
Doesn't make a paintball to the bag for no reason any less painful
imbedderdenu 23
Ummmmm
Charles900 16
Ask him: "Do you still want a girlfriend? I guess not! "
gabwielle 8
Shoot him between the legs and ask if he still wants to have sex
brieannamadelynn 8
That's messed up