Today, as I was getting into work, I saw a co-worker of mine walking in front of me. We're really good friends and we joke around a lot, so I jokingly whistled at him and slapped his butt. Turns out it wasn't my friend, it was the new guy. Hello, sexual harassment charges. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at work, my manager accidentally bumped into me, brushing my behind with the back of his hand. He was a bit embarrassed, so I jokingly said, “You could at least buy me dinner first!” He went to HR and told them I made him uncomfortable. I was just trying to lighten the mood. FML
Today, I got a coworker at my new job in trouble, because he kept harassing me and asking me out, even after I clearly told him I wasn't interested. Turns out he's very popular around here, and everyone now hates me for being a trouble-maker and not "taking a compliment." FML
Today, I met a new guy at work who wouldn't stop hitting on me. We ended up on a six-hour shift together watching a pool, so we were wearing nothing but bathing suits when he began grabbing me inappropriately. When I confided in my female coworker about it, she told me that he was her husband. FML
Today, I was chatting with a new guy at work. He cracked a joke about me and I jokingly gave him a light push on the shoulder. Half a second after I touched him, he threw himself back and hit the floor yelling in "pain". Now I'm suspended because of this psycho. FML
Today, I went into the store where my boyfriend works. I saw him talking to a customer, his back was facing me, so I went up and smacked his butt. Turns out it wasn't him. FML
Today, I've been into this guy at work forever, and we've been flirting more and more lately. Today he came up behind me, but I didn't see him. He said "Hi!" and scared me so bad that I farted. FML
Today, at work I got a message from some dude trying to flirt with me. While I was cracking up and making fun of him with my friends, I get a message from him saying look directly behind you, and there he was staring at me. FML
Today, I visited a friend at work with a couple of other friends. We like to play pranks, so we went to his register and started loudly discussing our masturbation habits as a joke. Some bitch complained, and his boss fired him and kicked us all out. FML
Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML
Today, after many years of being single, I finally worked up the courage to ask my coworker out. He said no and gave me "fair warning" that he's going to report me for sexual harassment. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
"No, I thought you were my friend you see. You have the same kind of butt— Not that I was looking at your butt. It's just from behind... Oh shit."
NyteProwleR 0
Wow what a loser, to file charges for that you'd have to be a real prick.
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Comments (33)
gigi2009 0
Oopsie!
jonny2x4 0
Next time, call "no ****" before or right after you smack a guy's booty.
SAVIORxOMEGA 0
Look before you slap dumbass
skullbuster 0
And now the new guy is going to tell everyone that you're a big flaming ass-grabbing **** ...not that there's anything wrong with that.
TeenageDirtbag_ 0
So I just got done watch the first season of Queer as Folk, and when I saw this it reminded me of how Brian is like always having sex with people who he meets at work. :D
jereinhorn 0
OK ASSHOLE..... Who in their right f-ing mind isn't aware that sexual harassment isn't a serious issue nowadays. And who isn't aware that it is very easy to be accused of it. SO why the hell would you risk a job by slapping anyone on the ass. Don't you realize, you pea-brained moron, that even if it had been your friend's ass that anyone who witnessed the act could have filed sexual harassment charges. Are people really this stupid?
smokebluntzz420 1
somebody needs to smoke some weed and calm the **** down
jereinhorn 0
you sir, are clueless!
masquerade08 0
My only question is do you work in a restaurant. That's really weak if you do. (btw, for people who and lame, and have never worked in a restaurant, who are probably the grade-a assholes who come in and don't tip, and demand everything in existence, and get upset when your server takes a damn sip of water... Sexual harassment is extremely common in restaurants. Also, underage sex, underage drinking, sleeping with managers, etc. I couldn't work anywhere else. :D It'd be far too boring.)
hawaiitrent 0
Your a man? Even if it's jokingly thats REALLY gay.
Carribu 0
Ass slapping = the highest form of male bonding.