Today, while laying in bed trying to go to sleep, I listened to the chirping crickets and appreciated how soothing the sounds were. Then I realized I lived on the 8th floor of an apartment building. Turns out my brother's science project got into my room and multiplied... a lot. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I woke up on the top bunk of my bed with the birds chirping. I felt so energized, I gave a big stretch, and my hand hit the ceiling. I accidentally pushed the ceiling board up and lots of tiny spiders fell on me and my bed. FML
Today, I live on the second floor and my neighbor from below banged on my door, telling me I sounded like a giant elephant and needed to learn to be quiet. I was eating ice cream in bed. I also live alone. FML
Today, I was relaxing in my dark, silent living room when I started hearing creepy, repeated sounds. It took me a while to realize those were the chickpeas I had left to swell up overnight in a glass container on the kitchen counter. FML
Today, I was gently awoken by my daylight alarm clock. So were about 15 wasps that had started building their nest underneath my bed. FML
Today, I moved into my brand new apartment, only to discover that there is an annoying, constant hum coming from the ceiling above my bed. FML
Today, while I was meditating in my room, I started to hear strange sounds. I was thrilled and thought I was having some sort of profound experience. It turned out my brother had tuned in to South Park out in the living room. FML
Today, I found out that there's a very loud and frisky couple living above my bedroom, and a family with a crying baby living above my living room. At this rate, I'll end up sleeping in the bathtub in my own home. FML
Today, I realized that my new house is next to an elementary school playground. I figured this out after I kept hearing loud high pitched screaming when the kids had recess from inside my house. My sensory issues are already thanking me. FML
Today, I was in my basement when I saw a giant cricket on the floor. I found an old plastic bottle of orange paint to drop on it and did so from about five feet up. The bottle exploded and splattered the walls and floor like a crime scene. The cricket hopped away untouched. FML
Today, I was taking a poop when I heard a window in my house break. Then, I heard things dropping upstairs. I decided to stay in the bathroom, which has a lock, and called the cops. Turns out it was just a bird that was trying to get at my fish in the fish tank that I have in my room. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
Hey, you could always get into his room and multiply... a lot. (;
elliebutton 0
There is some science thing involved with chirping crickets.. To convert cricket chirps to degrees Fahrenheit, count number of chirps in 14 seconds then add 40 to get temperature. Example: 30 chirps + 40 = 70° F To convert cricket chirps to degrees Celsius, count number of chirps in 25 seconds, divide by 3, then add 4 to get temperature. Example: 48 chirps /(divided by) 3 + 4 = 20° C Anyway, fyl.
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Comments (40)
elliebutton 0
There is some science thing involved with chirping crickets..
turtlemansam 6
inerrsting huh
itsharkley 8
No. But it IS interesting.
redbluegreen 41
Hey, you could always get into his room and multiply... a lot. (;
elliebutton 0
There is some science thing involved with chirping crickets.. To convert cricket chirps to degrees Fahrenheit, count number of chirps in 14 seconds then add 40 to get temperature. Example: 30 chirps + 40 = 70° F To convert cricket chirps to degrees Celsius, count number of chirps in 25 seconds, divide by 3, then add 4 to get temperature. Example: 48 chirps /(divided by) 3 + 4 = 20° C Anyway, fyl.
andytheCC 0
You could always count the chirps in (25/3)=8.3 seconds and then add 4 instead to get °C. Why count for 28 seconds and halve for farenheit when you count just count for 14?
thequickredofox 0
Oh gawd - that's my nightmare! Crickets, grasshoppers, evil jumpy, bitey bastards that no domestic spray can kill *shudder* I'd suggest a room swap but a boy's room is likely to be far more horrific than a plaque of crickets. FYL indeed.
thequickredofox 0
Actually has nothing to do with neat or tidy - my son's room is immaculately tidy. It's more that, once boys reach a certain age, their "odour" can be quite strong. The thought of being in a boy's room with all that aroma isn't for the feint hearted!
Frolly_fml 0
That's really not so bad.
shamille 5
yeah, at least they haven't crawled up his nose and invaded his brain yet.
growingupnextmon 3
Wow nice kinda unimportant formula but might be handy =). lol #2. but yeah FYL
LilaBear 2
How'd you not notice the crickets were inside your room? I like listening to the crickets outside, but they drive me NUTS when they're in my room because they're so loud.
americayay 0
Agreeing. That's why I'm calling FAKE.
thelonelylurker 0
How can they multiply inside your room? They need soil in which to lay eggs. Do you have soil in your room?! Don't be a pussay, they're just crickets.
cefarix 5
Cricket is my favorite sport.
sobe23 0
Same here. I hate when crickets are outside my window (1st story) they never shut up. How would you not notice a ton of crickets in your room?? If one is outside my room it's loud enough. So, im gonna call this a fake =)
Sparkey 0
I had crickets in my room once too. My housemate kept crickets for his pet lizard upstairs, and they sometimes escaped. My room was the first door under the stairs, and the popular destination for escaped crickets. He always denied they were his crickets. Interesting fact: crickets can live off of air and cardboard for ages.