Today, as I was cashing a customer out, he stopped me in the middle of the transaction just to tell me that the condoms he was buying are too big for him. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was buying condoms at Walmart. I grabbed the XL size, and the cashier commented, "Ahh, you'll definitely need a smaller size." FML
Today, I was standing in line at the checkout, and my children were arguing with each other. The guy in front of me sighed loudly and told me over his shoulder: "There're these things called condoms, you know." FML
Shy boy
Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML
Today, at my job as a cashier, a very old man came through my checkout. His purchase consisted of a box of condoms and a can of whipped cream. The creepy smile he gave me has scarred me for life. FML
Running commentary
Today, I nervously went to the store to buy condoms for the first time. I felt like everything was going well, and checked out happily. As I was walking out, the cashier lady said to the woman next in line, "He thinks he's going to need condoms." They both looked at me and started laughing. FML
The kindness of strangers
Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was, "God forbid a maxed-out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML
Today, I was on the phone with an elderly customer at work. I had to spend 10 minutes listening to him describe how the underwear he bought was too tight and caused his bladder to leak. FML
Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML
Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML
Today, I mentioned to my dad (we have a close relationship) that my last condom had expired. Happy to buy me new ones for the sake of safe sex, he asked me "Do you need small, or extra small?" FML
Top comments
Johnnylittle 3
At least he was being honest
BRLHP 24
Going by your username, id assume you have been in a similar situation.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (151)
DocBastard 40
Fortunately for him, he was still buying condoms. TO USE.
flipcrazy 0
Maybe he wants to start a condom museum. I just realized how stupid this idea sounded.
HairyPunisher 27
If you realized how stupid it sounded AS you were typing then why did you still post it?
KiddNYC1O 22
Because him/her posting it completes the joke, buzzkill.
tejkohlibusiness 5
What are you saying .. Its amazing
TranTienDuc 0
good ideal
willou35_fml 13
haha
HairyPunisher 27
If I'm perceiving this properly, the guy simply bought the wrong size of condoms and that's it. I really fail to see how this is an FML for OP. If OP is squeamish about anything sexual then yeah this could be an FML but the story is too vague to make that deduction.
perdix 31
Tell him a little Super-Glue will hold the oversized condom on just fine. Of course, he could be using the tactic of "under-promising then over-delivering."
sougstad 7
At least he is on top of the problem, and tackled it as soon as he realized that he needed to rectify the situation and get himself a more accurate fit. I mean, it would have been weird if he left the line mid check out with no explanation, so might as well man up at that point rather then have to pay extra somewhere else.
babygirl83150 8
Well that's not awkward.
captainburke 5
Ooooooooooookay..?
Enslaved 38
Maybe he was feeling shortchanged in more ways than one.:P