Today, I was on the phone with an elderly customer at work. I had to spend 10 minutes listening to him describe how the underwear he bought was too tight and caused his bladder to leak. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, while at work, I had to spend an hour and a half on the phone, listening to an old lady relive her entire day in excruciating detail. We're not allowed to hang up on customers, and she was extremely quick to dismiss all my attempts to steer the call back on topic. FML
Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML
Today, I made an attempt to be nicer to customers at my job as instructed, which resulted in me listening to a handful of elderly people's incontinence issues, and a meth-addict's multiple abortions in detail. FML
Today, at work, I spent half an hour on the phone with a customer. At the end of the conversation, as he was putting down the phone, I heard him say 'God, he was a miserable git'. I'm a 28 year old woman. FML
Today, I watched an old man pee himself while he was talking to me at work. I didn't do anything or say something, solely because he didn't get any on the floor. FML
Today, while at work, I really had to pee. Since my break was soon, I decided to hold it as another customer came to my till, but I didn't see she had 3 trolleys full of food. It took ages to scan all of it, and when I left for my break, I had an empty bladder and a wet seat. FML
Today, the bladder infection I thought I was over flared up at work, causing me to piss myself, despite having gone twice in the previous hour. I still had to finish my shift, soaked pants and all. FML
Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML
Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML
Today, I was at work at my local hospital. I went to the toilet to empty my bladder; the door was half open so I assumed it was empty. Upon opening the door, I was greeted with a half naked old man, who then yelled at me and violently shat himself, all over the walls and floor. FML
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Top comments
Grimmerie 31
he's leaking a bit too much information to you. urine for some unfortunate stories if you keep talking to him. if you haven't cotton by now, those undies are undesirable. are you tight with this man?
Burukasai 17
All of them make sense to me, and all of them are related to the FML. Very funny, #2. xD
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Comments (32)
clarkey 0
He needs a piss bag!
nicospec 1
So did OP tell him how tight her undies were?
The_Dude_Abides_ 0
is he telling you this because you are a underwear telemarketer?
Grimmerie 31
he's leaking a bit too much information to you. urine for some unfortunate stories if you keep talking to him. if you haven't cotton by now, those undies are undesirable. are you tight with this man?
kcnutt10 1
Please stop. You're only making yourself look like a jackass. Its not funny. It's not cute. You keep trying and you just keep failing.
dre_bro11 12
AND, they don't even make sense. Well at least to me.
Burukasai 17
All of them make sense to me, and all of them are related to the FML. Very funny, #2. xD
bioboy725 10
#2 is win
hiphopchick7 1
Lmao #2 it wouldve taken me forever to come up with tht #17 & #22 go **** urself
MetallicaRules19 4
an* elderly, if a word starts with a vowel or a letter that sounds like it starts with a vowel like m (em) the its an before it lol, it pisses me off for some reason...
clarkey 0
Go frag yourself!
Lizza330 28
Why didn't you say something insted of sit there and listen?
yummylicious 5
because the thought of old men wearing tight underwear with leaky bladders makes her horny.
stephanie911_fml 0
Maybe he didn't have anybody to talk to, Think about these things
Pinkanani 12
That's true too #5
nikki9tails 3
I was thinking the same thing
TheDrop 0
of we know OP didnt have anyone to talk too. why do u think he posted this FML?
nikki9tails 3
I was thinking more of the old man with the leaking issue
Pinkanani 12
It's not too hard to hang up. I used to be a phone operator and people would try to keep me on for as long as long as possible. Either interrupt them, hang up, or transfer them to someone else.
LifeSucksbtw 0
lol I love prank calling the operator :D! man I need a life. :(
babyale760 0
hahhahahahahahahahahhaha
KaitlynxD 5
an*
gozar_fml 1
Well that's your job right? What else would you have done with that ten minutes? Perform an emergency appendectomy? Land a 747 full of nuns on an icy runway? Check your job description. Yep there it is in the third section, second paragraph, "Listen to geezers talk about their excretory functions."
ohthebloodygore 16
11, not necessarily. If he called to complain, it could have been done professional. Even then, he was the one who purchased the underwear. Does he not know his size? If it usually is his size, and this certain brand/mark didn't fit... what did he expect? A refund? Exchange? I don't know about other countries, but here they don't refund and/or exchange underwear if they've been worn. I'd be pretty frustrated dealing with such idiotic customers.
daniirae 0
awee Hahah I love old people. the fact that you listened to him, probably made his day. whether you wanted to or not...