Today, after weeks of drinking my mom's vodka and replacing it with water, it now only tastes like water. She has a habit of drinking on Fridays. Today is Friday. My life is a ticking time bomb. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Boozehound
Today, my once-alcoholic mom told me that she would sell me for a shot of vodka. FML
Today, I confronted my mom about her drinking problems. After I blurted everything out, she completely denied it. She did this as she was drinking a huge cup full of vodka. FML
Today, my parents finally realized that I've been sneaking vodka when they weren't home. Note to self: don't let them freeze vodka that's actually 75% water. FML
Today, I helped myself to a small glass of cocktail from the fridge, not realising it was alcoholic. I told my mom what happened. She made me drink salty water until I vomited so I wouldn't get "alcohol poisoning". I'm 19. FML
Hair of the dog
Today, after a big house party the night before, I woke up with a dry mouth and a pounding hangover. I took a swig from a cup I'd left on my bedside table the night before, thinking it was water. Nope; it was vodka. FML
How very dare you?
Today, my drunken mother told me I'm just like my father and that I don't give a fuck about her. She's living in my home and drinking my wine. FML
It's just liquid fun
Today, I caught my mom trying to get secretly smashed out of her brain-box on booze at 8:00 a.m. FML
Glass houses and all that
Today, my mum got upset with me for having my first hangover ever after being of legal drinking age for over 6 years. She is a closet alcoholic in denial who hides red wine bottles around the house. FML
Today, my parents were having a Christmas party. They went out to get the vodka in our garage fridge, only to find most of it was frozen. Knowing vodka doesn't freeze, they soon realized that I had been taking some and refilling it with water over the past two months. FML
Today, I asked my mom why she drinks. She said she only drinks when she's depressed. My step-dad said she only drinks on the weekend. Those are the days I'm at her house. FML
Top comments
Keyman1212 14
Yelling Douchebags Incorporated.
philtheawesome 0
what about for the last few weeks? I thought Friday was every week...
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Comments (419)
creightontr 5
Run like hell!!!!!
horrorfreak79nj 2
Your pretty ****** retarded. Hopefully she beats the **** out of you until you fall into a deep coma & buys herself some more vodka. Then all of our problems will be solved
stoptrying 9
Someone was neglected as a child. And I really can't imagine why even their parents wanted nothing to do with them. /sarcasm
horrorfreak79nj 2
And thank crap it wasn't me. Christ I'm awesome.
skizzlerz 0
tell us how it goes lmao
HappyCello 0
If your not dead yet... here's an idea: just offer to make her a mixed drink, then you'll the opportunity to make it taste more alcoholic
laundryninja 1
Was it Smernovs?
roobin302 0
ask my homie jesus.. he can probably help..
Josiieeee 3
I completely understand how you feel..
omgdoublefml 3
God damn kids can't use their brains these days, this not an FML. It's more of a FWMB: **** where's my brain
Ibeatmyself 3
Dumbass
snippyxD 7
Are you a completely utter moron!?