Today, after volleyball practice, I noticed my pants were missing. Now I have to go to work wearing spandex bottoms, all because one of my teammates is a thieving douche. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was written up for being late to work. I was late because somebody in my dorm stole my pants. All of them. FML
Today, at my volleyball tournament I was extremely pumped to start playing so I went to take my sweats off and everybody began to stare at me then I looked down to come to realize I had no spandex on, just a thong. FML
Today, I found out who's been stealing clothes from me during swim practice. She called me a liar, despite wearing one of my sweaters, which has my initials stitched into it. FML
Today, in a rush, I accidentally wore my sister's underwear. I'm a guy. I had gym class today. FML
Today, someone broke into my house and stole all of my underwear. FML
Today, I realised half my underpants were missing. In related news, my slob of a housemate hasn't washed hers in several weeks, and has been stealing mine. FML
Today, my friend decided to pants me in the middle of the mall. I wasn't wearing underwear. FML
Today, I was at basketball practice and my coach asked me how my knee was. When I lifted my pants to show him, my cheetah print thong that had been stuck inside the pants from the dryer flew out to the ground. FML
Today, I was washing some clothes in the laundry room at my apartment complex. I went back an hour later, passed my neighbor on the way in, and moved my clothes to the dryer. I just brought them back from the dryer, and all my underwear are missing. FML
Today, at work, the seat of my pants ripped open. A coworker lent me a pair of his back-up jeans, and then those ripped in the crotch. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
PerfasarusRex 3
Think on the bright side you will probably get more tips today.
spekledworf 18
Rimmy Jobs... what kind of work are you doing?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (105)
couturedoll 7
Well you've got to work with what you've got. Rock those spandex bottoms! ;)
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Dat ass.
chicagoguy 2
Hey are you from the USA?
dlcj18 2
Yes ma'am lol wow haha pretty
gantoman 13
62- if you don't have anything to say, FML doesn't force people to comment.
panda_burrito 2
76- hypocrite
dlcj18 2
Oh yea!!!! Btw your cute
saylajay 1
What job would let you go in spandex
Dracoboxer357 36
13- Hooters? Fitness coach? Underwear model? Uhmmmm....construction? ;P
ApologyKick 25
Construction? Reminds me of the music video for foxtrot uniform charlie kilo...
dead247 13
Don't you mean Papa Oscar Romeo November?
ebonyirony 29
I think if you examine your name you will see that the thief is Jimmy. Jimmy Robs, miss rimmy jobs.
Dracoboxer357 36
14- Elementary, my dear Miss Irony! I see now that the game's afoot! ;P
Aspen_Grace33 27
You don't have time to run home to change or have someone run you over a pair of pants? I'm sure your job would be ok with you being a little late unless it's a frequent occurrence.
SkoomaKi 28
The phrase "Camel toe" came too quickly to my mind. On the bright side you can buy new pants!
MichellinMan 20
if I say anything negative towards this person, I will die. why would I, anyway?
SoultheWolf 19
There are such things called "lockers" where you put your items in it and close it, making sure only YOU can open it.
richard_cranium 4
My school's locker rooms don't have lockers. Maybe OP's doesn't either.
Hockeyboy4280 18
My hockey locker rooms don't either. We just hide our stuff in our hockey bags and hope for the best.
CyNommy 4
People can break into lockers as well.
bjf10 22
Yes, but they keep the honest people honest.
olpally 33
Just spike the ball at your teammate's face in the next practice, and say "**** you bitch!" :D revenge will be so easy for you!
PizzaRollsss 5
She doesn't know who it is. -_-
dead247 13
If she did hit the right girl...Play the lotto.
elflautoenpants 5
I think he's on to something... Go for the suspiciously bitchy girls... Or take out the ones you already dislike. hehe yay motives.
Nilla_Please 12
I'm sorry the name is waay to close to rim job :P I think she will be fine workin in spandex
IcedJesus 5
Good, not the only one thinking that..
SarcasticUnicorn 9
You could somehow make this work for you.
MolesterStallone 13
I wish every girl worked in spandex bottoms..
Schizomaniac 24
You do your name justice.
MolesterStallone 13
At least it's not boys!
kingjames2306 0
And i hope its not girls either
MolesterStallone 13
I love girls! But only my age!
ejjamael 5
I don't wish every girl....